Noob errors

[mmm...Dönitz]

Thought it might be a giggle sharing anecdotes about howlers you made while you were a trainee Kaleun. Here's my best so far.

1) Forgetting what zoom my periscope was on and running smack bang into the side of a ship while watching it sink.
2) Setting up a perfect shot only to forget that I was firing from tube 5. Those eels don't make 180degree turns very well
3) Running into the bottom while at 50meters on 32x TC.

[Sailor Steve]

Back in 2005, when the game was new, I was doing the gunnery training for about the fifth time (I keep starting over when new mods are released). I was shooting at a merchant from about 300 meters when he exploded, killing my entire bridge crew.

Shortest career ever.

[polynike]

Sailing into the quayside wall in Kiel (repeatedly)

[Piggy]

I did a major booboo this weekend, apparently I dont learn from my mistakes...

Note to self: Back up careers after every night of playing. (second time Ive said this to myself)

I had been having a few wobbly pops when I fired up SH3 the other night, I was a little pre-occupied talking to my wife when I selected my long running career, this would have been my 21st patrol, mid 43 except that I hit "new career" instead of "saved career"

A months worth of work gone!!!

[Penelope_Grey]

The best one for me was when I was at 256 TC and I hit the D key... needless to say it dived and never resurfaced.

[kranz]

yesterday I forgot how to use wheel for AOB, I was approaching medium cargo from her starboard but while seeking for AOB at the wheel I always got backboard value. After 1 hour I figured out that I forgot the basic formula for "real" AOB

[sharkbit]

Originally Posted by polynike

Sailing into the quayside wall in Kiel (repeatedly)

Did the same thing in Wilhelmshaven at high TC.

"WTF....Why am I getting damage reports?!?!?"
Pause....Zoom.
"Oh."

Pre-GWX:
Bernard leaned against the torpedo launch control("ENTER" key) by mistake while cruising thru the North Sea and launched an eel against the fishies.
Thankfully, GWX put a guard over the switch ("CTRL+ENTER") to prevent a reoccurence.

My latest:
Had some damage and minor flooding. I got clear and surfaced. Stopped the boat and put her with decks awash to load some external torpedoes (just a little something I do for realism sake) and hit the TC to speed up the process a little. The flooding was enough to pull me down off the surface. Next thing I know, I'm in the control room with the depth gauge winding around the dial.
I can't remember where it was when I got it under control and was able to blow tanks and get back up to the surface.

[flag4]

Originally Posted by Sailor Steve

Back in 2005, when the game was new, I was doing the gunnery training for about the fifth time (I keep starting over when new mods are released). I was shooting at a merchant from about 300 meters when he exploded, killing my entire bridge crew.

Shortest career ever.

CLASSIC!

[klh]

My list are repeats of others' and most happened in SH2.

1) Trying to drive and fire the deck gun at the same time, only too late realizing that nobody else was watching where we were going. "Collision Alarm!"

2) Forgetting to negate the "silent running" order and wondering why the sub is filling with water and the repair crews are just whistling Dixie.

3) Order crash dive on a harbor raid when spotting a DD heading for me.

4) Ordering "rudder amidships" and the crew hears "Torpedo los" as I fat finger the ENTER key by mistake (before modding the key map).

5) Believing I could shoot down aircraft any better than the rest of my idiot crew.

6) Setting my time warp too high while leaving base and running into black holes.

7) Trying to transfer external torpedoes while chasing a convoy only to be spotted by some eagle-eyed Tommy.

[Jay]

I've been playing SH3 for a long time, but still make "noobie" mistakes. Here's the latest.

It's November, 1941; south of Ireland. My sonarman detects two ships, so I set an intercept course. It's night time, and I'm surfaced. The first vessel (lit up like the proverbial X-mas tree) is a hospital ship. Honour forbids attacking it.

I turn my attention to the second ship, a small ocean liner, suspiciously running without lights. Anticipating that the liner may be a legitimate target, I click on the "surface attack" button, and immediately switch to the weapons officer's station. To my surprise, I hear the sound of gun fire. I go to the bridge and discover that my gunner is shooting at the hospital ship! Before I can order "hold fire", the hospital ship has been hit twice. My goof here was twofold. First, I forgot that when sea conditions permit, the surface attack command orders the deck gun to be manned. Second (and more critically), earlier in this mission, I had given the gunner the "fire at will" order, and forgot to change it.

To make matters worse, the attack on the hospital ship alerted the ocean liner, and it began to fire at me. In response to this hostile action, my adrenaline kicked in. I went to periscope depth, and launched two torpedoes. Both hit. As the liner began to sink, I calmed down and took the time to look at its flag. Another goof: it's American, and the US is still officially neutral.

I'm embarrassed to admit that this was the second neutral ship I managed to sink on this patrol (the first was part of a large convoy which I had attacked at night). My renown for this mission was -54. What will my fellow kaleuns be saying about me at the Nightclub?

[Lzs von swe]

Mistakes? I don´t do mistakes, it´s always Bernards fault

OK, OK, some may be my fault, or many of them

Attacking a convoy by the Rockalls. Pressing on the attack. Swing the scope around and here comes a Flower from our 6. ALLAARM, crash dive and, CLANK...
We planted our bow firmly into the Rockalls, our stern pointing to the sky.
Now, if that Flower did not already have our pos she did now. Reversing on full tilt and blowing ballast did nothing. I then ordered silent running, as if that would help now Did not

Note to self: Keep track of your possition at all times. Do not follow your targets up on the shallows, and it is shallow on parts of the Rockalls.

[kuchciol]

I remember getting a message from the BdU saying that it's ok to sink neutrals in the North Sea if they are armed. I think it was still in '39. Little did I know that it was the "immersion thing". A day later, lo and behold, I met a Dutch ship, sitting quietly, 0 speed, lotsa guns. Sent it down with a pretty hit. After I came home from what woul;d have been a nice patrol I noticed I got a huge renown hit. And ship's been counted as a neutral. Freakin' Adolf got me screwed again.
I consider it a noob mistake, and the lesson learned is: forget the BdU messages, do your stuff.

[Robert Fulton]

Originally Posted by Lzs von swe

...

Note to self: Keep track of your possition at all times. Do not follow your targets up on the shallows, and it is shallow on parts of the Rockalls.

It would be nice if we could order the Navigator to read out depth under keel at regular intervals in the same way we can order the sonar man to read out bearings.

[mmm...Dönitz]

I've often thought this too. I'm ot sure how things really worked on a U-boat, but I would have thought that the person controlling the depth would have an idea of the depth of the surrounding water at least from charts, and would be able to warm his Kaleun if things were getting a bit shallow.

[Sailor Steve]

In certain areas (around well-known and well-charted coastal areas) the actual depths were, well, known. The problem is that a submerged submarine has no way of knowing exactly where it is, and the only way to test the depth is to use the echelot, or depth-sounder. This was a form of active sonar, and anybody listening in the area could hear it. If the water was shoaling (getting shallower) they would have no way of knowing but by guessing. On the other hand, scraping the bottom wasn't usually problematic as long as there weren't too many large rocks.