29 Things The Crew'll Mutiny Over

[geekichick]

This was inspired in part by Skippy's List




Traci lie reading in her bunk, when suddenly the entire crew filed in around her.


The XO began “Uh...Captain, we need to talk. We don’t have a problem with you personally, but there are some things...”


“...Some things we’ll freakin’ mutiny over, if you don’t knock it off” finished Chief Engineer Erdmann.


The XO hands Traci a list.


“Ok, lets see what you have here:”


1, You are to stop calling us your minions, regardless of how accurate it is.


2. We are not renaming the boat “Rumble Fish.”


3. You’re not allowed to drive the boat anymore. Ever.


4. We don't have room for a pizza oven. Stop asking.


5. Emil is not a bajillion years old. It is wrong to imply otherwise.


6. The boat does not have a “ludicrous speed” setting.


7. Stop referring to the boat as the Tracimobile.


8. You are to stop referring to the XO as “Cyclops”, regardless of how accurate it is.


9 You are to stop screaming “I AM SHIVA, DESTROYER OF WORLDS!!” at passing ships.


10. You are to stop singing “She Goes Down” every time we dive.


11. You are to stop referring to the Quartermaster as “Sugar Daddy.”


12. We are not calling you “Her Fuhrer.”


13. We’re not building you a throne room, either.


14. Great Britain is not “Mordor.”


15. You are to stop yelling “WE RIDE FOR GONDOR AND WAR!” every time we leave port.


16. We will no longer block the canal at Kiel while you scream "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!"


17. We are not the Knights Who Say Ni.


18. Willi will not quote Scotty.


19. You are no longer allowed to ski behind the boat.


20. We will no longer return to port for your booty calls.


21. Max would like you to stop calling him “Killer Baer.”


22. You are to stop hogging the deck gun.


23. Reading “War Of The Worlds” over the radio isn’t that funny.


24. In fact, you are no longer to use the radio unsupervised. Last time it took us seven hours to get you off.


25. You are to stop yelling “THAR SHE BLOWS!” when launching a torpedo.


26. You are to stop talking like a pirate, period.


27. No, we will not fly a pirate flag when we return to port. We’re on thin ice as it is.


28. You will stop referring to Commodore Donitz as “Commodore Donuts”, we are on thin ice as it is.


29. When moving through port to the pen, you are to stop firing warning shots at ships that don’t acknowledge your right of way. WE ARE ON THIN ICE AS IT IS.


Traci looks up and rolls her eyes, “geez, you guys need to lighten up. Now go back to your stations, I’m trying to read. I’ll take your list under advisement. Now flee before me, or feel my wrath.”


The crew glare at her.


“Wow, I was just kidding. Chill”

[Rwearjr]

LOL......Good stuff Geekichick!
-Wayne, U-41 Wilhelmshaven

[geekichick]

Originally Posted by Rwearjr

LOL......Good stuff Geekichick!
-Wayne, U-41 Wilhelmshaven

Thank you!

[Sailor Steve]

I don't know who I feel worse for - Traci or her crew. Either way, good stuff!