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Old 01-08-10, 11:37 AM   #1
mookiemookie
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Default Talking in your sleep

This woman writes down what her English husband says in his sleep. Some of these are priceless:

http://sleeptalkinman.blogspot.com/

My favorite: "Do you like what you see? No? Well, bloody look harder. Strain your eyes!"

(note: strong language)
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Old 01-08-10, 11:47 AM   #2
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The guy talks like he is possessed by a demon. You should hear my wife. She sings and talks clear as bell. It is funny.
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Old 01-08-10, 11:49 AM   #3
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Quote:
"I'd rather peel off my skin and bathe my weeping raw flesh in a bath of vinegar than spend any time with you. But that's just my opinion. Don't take it personally."
Holy cow that dude has issues !
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Old 01-08-10, 12:46 PM   #4
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Wow.. I wonder what I say in my sleep. According to my wife I do talk while sleeping, but luckily, she doesnt speak German so she can't understand a word of it..
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Old 01-08-10, 03:28 PM   #5
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Before my wife and I were married 11 years ago, we had to attend a marriage retreat in Estes Park, Colorado. (She's Catholic, I'm not, and the church required either this retreat or a once a week course for 8 weeks).

Anyway, the group (probably 15-20 couples) had to stay in a dorm, segregated of course-don't want any of that pre-marital hanky panky going on you know.

I was in a room with five other guys and one of them, who used to drive tanks in the Army, said he needed to warn us that he doesn't talk in his sleep, but screams in his sleep.

Sure enough, about 2 in the morning...."HERE THEY ****ING COME!!! GET READY!!!! OH MY GOD!!!! ARE YOU OK? AHHHHHH!!!!!"

Scared the hell out of all of us. Someone turns on the lights and he is in bed asleep. One of the guys wakes him up and asks if he's alright. He says he is. He asks if he was screaming. Somehow we eventually go back to sleep.

Next morning, the guy doesn't remember any of it.

I've often wondered how well that marriage has gone over the years.
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Old 01-08-10, 03:35 PM   #6
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Quote:
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I've often wondered how well that marriage has gone over the years.

If his wife is anything like my fiance, she could sleep through the apocalypse.
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Old 01-08-10, 04:24 PM   #7
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"Peeing standing up rules!" CLASSIC!!
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Old 01-08-10, 04:44 PM   #8
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Sharkbit made me remember my college room mates buddy who was a Vietnam helicopter pilot. He would often sit straight up in bed as if flying a helicopter over the war zone. He would call out to his crew and ground control. One night he was screaming that the helicopter was going down. He was moving his hands like pulling the controls. Yelling to everyone to bail. He then jumped off the bed as if bailing out of the damage helicopter. His wife said it scared the living hell out of her.

The mind does some strange things when it reached deep REM sleep.
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Old 01-09-10, 03:00 PM   #9
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Good job he wasn't a former Gynecologist
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Old 01-09-10, 11:01 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jimbuna View Post
Good job he wasn't a former Gynecologist
Somewhere here there's a great joke involving a man screaming "FIRE IN THE HOLE" in his sleep, but I'm just too tired to look for it.
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Old 01-09-10, 11:47 PM   #11
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I used to whisper "headshot" in my sleep some months ago when i spent *at least* 4 hours a day with my newly scoped gamo air rifle.
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