How To Save The Airlines

SUBMAN1 · 04-18-08, 05:00 PM

Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.

Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! What the hell -- They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?

The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party atmosphere' going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women.

Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and 'special services.'

Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.

This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.

Why didn't Bush think of this? Why do I still have to do everything myself?

Sincerely,
Bill Clinton

Graf Paper · 04-18-08, 10:34 PM

Does this mean that Delta Airlines will have to change their slogan from "Fly the friendly skies." to "Fly the really friendly skies!"? :p

mcf1 · 04-19-08, 12:02 AM

Great idea

nikimcbee · 04-19-08, 02:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Graf Paper

Does this mean that Delta Airlines will have to change their slogan from "Fly the friendly skies." to "Fly the really friendly skies!"? :p

Can I touch?:rotfl:

...wait, what happens in first class?:hmm:

nikimcbee · 04-19-08, 02:29 AM

One problem, how do you keep the pilots in the cabin?

04-18-08, 05:00 PM	#1
SUBMAN1 Rear Admiral Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 11,866 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	How To Save The Airlines Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place. Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! What the hell -- They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss? The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party atmosphere' going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women. Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and 'special services.' Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues. This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset. Why didn't Bush think of this? Why do I still have to do everything myself? Sincerely, Bill Clinton __________________

04-18-08, 10:34 PM	#2
Graf Paper Ace of the Deep Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Pacific Northwest United States Posts: 1,146 Downloads: 41 Uploads: 2	Does this mean that Delta Airlines will have to change their slogan from "Fly the friendly skies." to "Fly the really friendly skies!"? :p __________________ Still sailing the high seas, hunting convoys with those who join me.

04-19-08, 02:29 AM	#5
nikimcbee Fleet Admiral Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Patroling the Slot. Posts: 17,952 Downloads: 90 Uploads: 0	One problem, how do you keep the pilots in the cabin? __________________

04-19-08, 12:02 AM	#3
mcf1 Seasoned Skipper Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Greece, Volos Posts: 710 Downloads: 10 Uploads: 0	Great idea