Bernard Strikes Again

[Blacklight]

I was in the middle of a very unsuccessful mission in 1940. I had traveled all the way from Wilhelmshaven, around the northern coast of Britain, and from there all the way south almost to Spain without finding a SINGLE ship to sink.

Finally, my hydrophone guy announces that he hears a merchant approaching. It was a small merchant so I blew her apart with a torpedo (The water was too rough for the deck gun). Anyway, she must have got a radio message out because shortly after, a C & C Class destroyer was steaming my way at full speed. My aft was pointed toward her so I fired a shot with magnetic pistol at her as she approached. It detonated perfectly under her hull. The big gaping hole underneath her bow and the fire burning on top didn't deter her. She kept me underwater with depth charges for an hour and a half without sinking.

Finally I was able to get far enough away from her to get to periscope depth and try another shot. She spotted me instantly and ran at me full speed. I only had time to fire off one shot with a magnetic pistol and crash dive as she came at me. The seccond shot detonated under her, blasting another gaping hole in her bow. However, she still showed no sign of sinking at all and kept me underwater with depth charges this time for about two hours.

Eventually, she assumed me gone and took off. By this time, I was angry and cursing "SINK YOU *expletive* SINK !!!!" over and over again. I decided then and there that I was going to damn well make that annoying ship into an artificial reef at all costs !!!

I couldn't chase it submerged because it was going too fast so I surfaced and gave chase, all ahead flank ! At last, my watch crew sighted the ship (I think they were playing cards up there or something because the sighted it when it was REALLY REALLY CLOSE).

Then everything went FUBAR.

My watchman asked "What do you want to do ? "Go to Periscope Depth ?" "Engage it with the Deck Gun ?" "Crash Dive ?" or "Maintain Orders ?"

Suddenly I hear from the top deck, Bernard yell "LEEEEEEEEEROY JENKINS !!!" and I hear the deck gun fire !!!! (Yep.. you guessed it.. I had accidentally clicked "Engage the Target with Deck Gun" when I was aiming for "Periscope Depth ). In my panic to crash dive, I managed to fire a torpedo off to nowhere by accident. Then shells impacted the top deck, blowing all my crew off the topside and into the water. Another shell slammed into the command room flooding it with water. We were sprayed by machine gun fire and simultaniously a shell hit my engine room destroying both engines turning my crash dive into just us sitting there with the conning tower barely under water.

The last thing I saw when I turned the periscope ,hopeing to at least get a last shot at my worthy opponent, was her bow coming straight at me at full speed. There was a loud "TINK !!" and my periscope was knocked right off the Uboat. This was followed by a loud "CRUNCH !!!" as her hull ground over the hull of my Uboat. My Uboat went down to the bottom in a million pieces.

Bernard managed to survive clinging to some floating wreckage. The destroyer picked him up and Great Britain had him shipped back to Germany so the Kriegsmarine could deploy him in more Uboats.

[Tango589]

Don't you just love having Bernard in the navy?