[WIP] Senseless and crazy candy stuff for SH3

[Nemo66]

Hey mates,

here's my personal list what senseless candy stuff i imagine to be very funny in a WW2 subsim (favourable in SH 3 of course )

I started this thread to talk with you about all that small fancy stuff that is not really needed in a game, but big fun to have. I find it interesting to know what crazy ideas might come together discussing each one's totally senseless modding pipedreams !!!


1. Sealife

Whales spouting near the ship, Dolphins surfing ahead your bow, or swarms of flying fish accompanying your boat have been mentioned before i think. But we could take this a step further: Why not having Moby Dick (or at least one of it's grandsons) surprisingly ramming the boat, eating the captain's leg if he is too slow to get inside the tower. Also a giant squid trying to pull the boat down to the deep dark sea would be fine. So fill up your compressed air tanks before activating that one, mates!

2. Badebetrieb

Boats far from any shipping route, especially those in southern seas, did a special thing called "Badebetrieb" which i would translate into "bathing operations". Therefore they submerged the boat a bit and the crew went naked on deck and could have a fresh bath in the ocean. I find this funny because it's the only way to swim in the ocean while still being aboard a ship, way better than any swimming-pool on a holiday cruiser! This could be connected to crew fatigue so that all the bathers are totally refreshed again in minutes. Some hypercatholic fundamentalists aboard could loose moral, resulting in not refreshable fatigue status. (When I started this thread 10 years ago in the SH3 wishlist i got lots of comments about homoerotic tendencies )

3. Ghostships

The "Flying Dutchman" and other unkillable zombies haunting the seas could pay a visit to the boat from time to time, scaring the crew to death, resulting in total fatigue and a mentally distorted navigational officer who only does very scratchy, unuseable plotting lines for the next few hours. Especially nice in lonely sea areas where nothing ever happens.

4. Love, desire and other things to make life a living hell

Sexy mermaids could enter the boat, taking the captain with them to their undersea mermaid paradise, if he is not resistable like old Ulysses. The navigation officer would be totally out of order too, and not even capable to navigate to his own sleeping place. The crew would be totally taken out, loose all their skills, left behind in total confusion, fighting each other in order to get a mermaid of their own. The player would have to find his homebase without functioning crew, Nav Officer, or any map or navigation tool.

5. Everyday real-life problems

The crew could experience stomach sickness by rotten food or bad cooking, leading to crew fatigue and uncontrollable cook-keelhauling.
Or parts of the crew could be drunk because somebody smuggled several brandy bottles into the boat, resulting in uncontrollable singing (especially mean while at silent running) and telling dirty jokes, sneaking crew fatigue included. Or the crew could get into serious trouble with a totally fed up toilet!
(don't ever activate that one at the same time you have "stomach sickness mod" active, this could lead to instant inner hull crash)

What crazy and senseless candy mods wait in the depths of your mind to finally make their way to the surface in this thread ?

[HundertzehnGustav]

6) Kaleun's ammo storage mod...

the uncontrollable singing could e stopped by shooting the guys in the face and then pumping them out of a torpedo tube. This would boost moral because the concept is so hilarious to the entire crew -
however it can only be done when at Periscope depth -

this means that when being Bombed in the deep, the corpse of the "suddenly diseased" will be paraded throughout the boat in order to remind everyone to keep the noise down or they will face the same fate.

Moral once again goes through the roof, and effectiveness rises as well.
A total silence is the result, and silent running gains in effectiveness, making detection even harder.

If the corpse can not get flushed out or tossed overboard after 24 hours, the stain will start to affect the crew, and reverse the process.