Contest: Pick al-Qaida’s New Name

Feuer Frei! · 06-24-11, 06:59 PM

Play Don Draper for a moment. What do you think about when you think about al-Qaida? The senseless slaughter of innocents, right? As it turned out, even Osama bin Laden thought his terrorist organization needed an image reboot.
The Associated Press reports that some of bin Laden***8217;s final writings display an obsession with how far al-Qaida***8217;s brand had fallen. While the United States has flagellated itself for years for losing the information wars in the Muslim world, bin Laden thought he was worse off, irreparably tainting his terrorist organization by killing too many Muslims. He started brainstorming new names.
The problem is that bin Laden sucks as a brand manager. One of his new handles for al-Qaida? ***8220;Monotheism and Jihad Group.***8221; That was the original name of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi***8217;s bloodthirsty al-Qaida franchise in Iraq that killed so many Muslims that Ayman Zawahiri begged Zarqawi to stop. When Zarqawi didn***8217;t listen, he lost his Iraqi allies, got blown up by the United States, and his group snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. Not exactly a model for a new look.

Here are some submissions so far:

Westboro Baptist Church
by Anonymous

League of Extraordinary Beards
by Anonymous

Kandahar Ardent Brotherhood Of Orthodox Muslims (KABOOM)
by Anonymous

iQaeda
by Anonymous

Angry Beards
by Anonymous

Bad News Beards
by Neil

Terrorists Without Borders
by MG

Yes We Quran!
by JT

The Artist Formerly Known as Al-Qaida
by Anonymous

SEAL bait
by Mac

72 Virgin Airways
by n29_w95

Turbanators
by Anonymous

Dr. Bin Laden's 100% Natural Good Time Terror Band Solution
by dan

Quran Quran
by Anonymous

Why hide it any more? Inter-Services Intelligence
by Anonymous

"Weird Al" Qaeda
by EMRJKC'94

Talk Abottabad Place to Hide
by Anonymous

Not Al Qaeda
by Anonymous

The Organization for Justifying US Military Expenditures
by wial

2 Beards 1 Cup
by Anonymous

Dead Men Walking!
by Rick Allen

All Your Beards Are Belong To Us!
by SnugglePuppy

Goat Ropers
by bdenham

Cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
by Anonymous

SOURCE

Submit your entries now!

yubba · 06-25-11, 03:01 PM

Gee Feuer, this one is a tuffy and usually I'm pretty quick with a smart @$$ remark, a poofier name for Al Qaida Rinds, spicy hot fried pork skins. I'm at a loss, damn I must be loosing my touch. I think instead of killing these sobes we catch them, give them a sex change and send them back as women, where's your god now.

MH · 06-25-11, 05:17 PM

Al gamma al Majnoonyia al Islamiya.
Pardon my arabic.
-Brotherhood of islamic nutcases.

Freiwillige · 06-25-11, 10:25 PM

Cobraaaaaaaaa!

Here is my submission......DEAD

06-25-11, 10:42 PM

Targets'R'us

Sledgehammer427 · 06-25-11, 11:34 PM

The writers of Anarchist's Cookbook: Jihad Edition

NeonSamurai · 06-26-11, 08:49 AM

We strap explosives to children in the name of God

Acronym sucks though.

Jimbuna · 06-26-11, 09:01 AM

Terminally Ill

MH · 06-26-11, 10:26 AM

The blow jobs anonymous......oopss sorrry.

06-26-11, 11:19 AM

Team hit Bella with a plane.

yubba · 06-27-11, 08:35 PM

Al Ka Boooommmmeeerrrrrrrsssssss took me long enough.

Headed by Bin Poopin hopin not to have premature explosion syndrome.

kiwi_2005 · 06-27-11, 08:38 PM

The Jihadohvah Witnesses.

krashkart · 06-27-11, 08:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimbuna

Terminally Ill

Sums it up about right.

My entry would be "Those Who Shall Not Be Recognized"

Castout · 06-28-11, 12:31 AM

JWC

Jihadists without cause

Honesty can be brutal huh. False cause is not a cause. It is chaos and madness. Where are they when people rose against Mubarak or Ben Ali. Where are they when Libyans are fighting Gaddafi? I tell you they don't have a cause that is worthy of killing and sacrificing lives. Madmen with AK-47 and some doctrine taken from Quran and an appetite for violence. Nothing more. Their struggle is not for the good of mankind but to establish their ideological belief and force it upon everyone else. Blind men guiding other blind men. We should pity them. Dictators at least get a very comfortable life but a terrorist gets neither heaven or this world. It's a struggle in the name of vanity.

BossMark · 06-28-11, 01:28 AM

The killers of many innocents or we are sick bastards

06-24-11, 06:59 PM	#1
Feuer Frei! Navy Seal Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Valhalla Posts: 5,295 Downloads: 141 Uploads: 17	Contest: Pick al-Qaida’s New Name Play Don Draper for a moment. What do you think about when you think about al-Qaida? The senseless slaughter of innocents, right? As it turned out, even Osama bin Laden thought his terrorist organization needed an image reboot. The Associated Press reports that some of bin Laden*8217;s final writings display an obsession with how far al-Qaida8217;s brand had fallen. While the United States has flagellated itself for years for losing the information wars in the Muslim world, bin Laden thought he was worse off, irreparably tainting his terrorist organization by killing too many Muslims. He started brainstorming new names. The problem is that bin Laden sucks as a brand manager. One of his new handles for al-Qaida? 8220;Monotheism and Jihad Group.8221; That was the original name of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi8217;s bloodthirsty al-Qaida franchise in Iraq that killed so many Muslims that Ayman Zawahiri begged Zarqawi to stop. When Zarqawi didn8217;t listen, he lost his Iraqi allies, got blown up by the United States, and his group snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. Not exactly a model for a new look. Here are some submissions so far: Westboro Baptist Church* by Anonymous League of Extraordinary Beards by Anonymous Kandahar Ardent Brotherhood Of Orthodox Muslims (KABOOM) by Anonymous iQaeda by Anonymous Angry Beards by Anonymous Bad News Beards by Neil Terrorists Without Borders by MG Yes We Quran! by JT The Artist Formerly Known as Al-Qaida by Anonymous SEAL bait by Mac 72 Virgin Airways by n29_w95 Turbanators by Anonymous Dr. Bin Laden's 100% Natural Good Time Terror Band Solution by dan Quran Quran by Anonymous Why hide it any more? Inter-Services Intelligence by Anonymous "Weird Al" Qaeda by EMRJKC'94 Talk Abottabad Place to Hide by Anonymous Not Al Qaeda by Anonymous The Organization for Justifying US Military Expenditures by wial 2 Beards 1 Cup by Anonymous Dead Men Walking! by Rick Allen All Your Beards Are Belong To Us! by SnugglePuppy Goat Ropers by bdenham Cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! by Anonymous SOURCE Submit your entries now! __________________ "History is the lies that the victors agree on"- Napoleon LINK TO MY SH 3 MODS

06-25-11, 11:34 PM	#6
Sledgehammer427 PacWagon Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Drinking coffee and staring at trees in Massachusetts Posts: 2,908 Downloads: 287 Uploads: 0	The writers of Anarchist's Cookbook: Jihad Edition __________________ Cold Waters Voice Crew - Fire Control Officer Cmdr O. Myers - C/O USS Nautilus (SS-168) 114,000 tons sunk - 4 Spec Ops completed V-boat Nutcase - Need supplies? Japanese garrison on a small island in the way? Just give us a call! D4C!

06-26-11, 08:49 AM	#7
NeonSamurai Ocean Warrior Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Socialist Republic of Kanadia Posts: 3,044 Downloads: 25 Uploads: 0	We strap explosives to children in the name of God Acronym sucks though. __________________ SH3 Newbie Guide Links and other helpfull stuff

06-26-11, 09:01 AM	#8
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,473 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Terminally Ill __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

06-27-11, 08:38 PM	#12
kiwi_2005 Eternal Patrol Join Date: May 2004 Location: Aeoteroa Posts: 7,382 Downloads: 223 Uploads: 1	The Jihadohvah Witnesses. __________________ RIP kiwi_2005 Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

06-25-11, 03:01 PM	#2
yubba Admiral Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: in a neighborhood near you Posts: 2,478 Downloads: 293 Uploads: 2	Gee Feuer, this one is a tuffy and usually I'm pretty quick with a smart @$$ remark, a poofier name for Al Qaida Rinds, spicy hot fried pork skins. I'm at a loss, damn I must be loosing my touch. I think instead of killing these sobes we catch them, give them a sex change and send them back as women, where's your god now.

06-25-11, 05:17 PM	#3
MH Ocean Warrior Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 3,184 Downloads: 248 Uploads: 0	Al gamma al Majnoonyia al Islamiya. Pardon my arabic. -Brotherhood of islamic nutcases.

06-25-11, 10:25 PM	#4
Freiwillige The Old Man Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Phx. Az Posts: 1,458 Downloads: 24 Uploads: 0	Cobraaaaaaaaa! Here is my submission......DEAD

06-25-11, 10:42 PM	#5
darius359au Stowaway Posts: n/a Downloads: Uploads:	Targets'R'us

06-26-11, 10:26 AM	#9
MH Ocean Warrior Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 3,184 Downloads: 248 Uploads: 0	The blow jobs anonymous......oopss sorrry.

06-26-11, 11:19 AM	#10
Rilder Stowaway Posts: n/a Downloads: Uploads:	Team hit Bella with a plane.

06-27-11, 08:35 PM	#11
yubba Admiral Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: in a neighborhood near you Posts: 2,478 Downloads: 293 Uploads: 2	Al Ka Boooommmmeeerrrrrrrsssssss took me long enough. Headed by Bin Poopin hopin not to have premature explosion syndrome.

06-28-11, 12:31 AM	#14
Castout Silent Hunter Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Jakarta Posts: 4,794 Downloads: 89 Uploads: 6	JWC Jihadists without cause Honesty can be brutal huh. False cause is not a cause. It is chaos and madness. Where are they when people rose against Mubarak or Ben Ali. Where are they when Libyans are fighting Gaddafi? I tell you they don't have a cause that is worthy of killing and sacrificing lives. Madmen with AK-47 and some doctrine taken from Quran and an appetite for violence. Nothing more. Their struggle is not for the good of mankind but to establish their ideological belief and force it upon everyone else. Blind men guiding other blind men. We should pity them. Dictators at least get a very comfortable life but a terrorist gets neither heaven or this world. It's a struggle in the name of vanity. __________________ My blog: http://exposingsingapore.wordpress.com/

06-28-11, 01:28 AM	#15
BossMark Fleet Admiral Join Date: May 2011 Location: Leeds, West Yorkshire Posts: 15,272 Downloads: 278 Uploads: 0	The killers of many innocents or we are sick bastards __________________ Never trust the Tories look what Thatcher and Major did in the 80s and 90s and look what the wicked witch May is doing now doing now