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SUBSIM: The Web's #1 resource for all submarine & naval simulations since 1997 |
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#1 |
XO
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The Navy Invented Sex
A Marine and a sailor were sitting in a bar one day arguing over which was the superior service. After a swig of beer the Marine says, 'Well, we had Iwo Jima.' Arching his eyebrows, the sailor replies, 'We had the Battle of Midway. 'Not entirely true', responded the Marine. 'Some of those pilots were Marines, in fact, Henderson Field on Guadalcanal was named after a Marine pilot killed at the Battle of Midway.' The sailor responds, 'Point taken.' The Marine then says, 'We Marines were born at Tunn Tavern!' The sailor, nodding agreement, says, 'But we had John Paul Jones.' The argument continued until the sailor comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion. With a flourish of finality he says...... 'The Navy invented sex!' The Marine replies, 'That is true, but it was the Marines who introduced it to women.' |
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#2 |
Ships Secretary
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: MilesCity Montana
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OORAH !
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Just help someone.....it makes a difference |
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#3 |
Sea Lord
![]() Join Date: May 2008
Location: London UK
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A marine and a sailor are in the bathroom taking a p***
When the marine goes to leave without washing up the sailor says "In the navy they teach us to wash our hands" The marine turns to the sailor and says "In the Marines they teach us not to p*** on our hands!" |
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#4 |
Eternal Patrol
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The Admiral and the General were arguing about which service had the tougher men. Since they were on an aircraft carrier, the General called one of his men over. "Marine", he said, "you see that mast up there? That's about two hundred feet above the water. I want you to climb to the top of that mast and jump off!"
"Sir, yes sir!" replied the marine, and proceeded to do just that. "I think I just proved that marines are tougher than sailors." Said the General. The Admiral then called over one of his sailors and repeated the orders. The sailor blinked at his boss and said "With all due respect, sir, **** you, sir!" The Admiral held out his hand to the General and said "Pay up!"
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“Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo |
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#5 |
Chief of the Boat
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Reporter to a US Marine sniper.
"What do you feel when you shoot a Iraqi insurgent?" The Marine looks at the reporter thoughtfully, then shrugs and simply replies "Recoil". |
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#6 |
Eternal Patrol
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Of course it's the Air Force which has the smartest enlisted men.
In what other service do the enlisted send their officers off to do the fighting and dying while they remain behind?
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“Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo |
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#7 |
Lieutenant
![]() Join Date: May 2008
Location: The absolutely most exciting state!! Iowa!
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I prefer Marines, But without the navy, we wouldn't have marines. Back in the ancient times is when the Marine was created. The Romans are the ones who really started on it big though. In order to defeat the Carthaginians , who were better sailors and rammed their opponents, the Romans came up with the idea to put fully armed soldiers on board and then board the enemy ships with planks. Thus the Marine was born. What the United States has done is making them a seperate force on par and above the rest of the branches of the armed forces.
Yea, I know. I'm a history geek. ![]()
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![]() "Loved By Few, Hated By Many, Respected By All."-The U-boats. |
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#8 |
Sea Lord
![]() Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: In sight of Stonehenge
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The USMC is paid for by the Department of the Navy, therefore Marines are really just Navy guys in desert BDU.
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![]() All my mods are available at MediaFire: SH3 Mods Other modders SH3 mods SH4 Mods ...you can't please all of the people all of the time... |
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#9 |
Watch
![]() Join Date: May 2008
Location: Düsseldorf, Germany
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![]() A bit offtopic, but somewhat related:
Long time ago, I was an afficionado of online combat flightsims. One of these games included a lot of carrier operations on certain arenas. One day, I refused to join my squad starting a raid from a carrier and said just for the fun: "I would join the navy if I was gay.", One of my squadmates replied: "So, as far I understand: 1. Flying fighters: not gay. 2. Hotbunking in order to fly fighters: VERY gay!" Seldom laughed so heartily. Almost bit off my headsed mic laughing. P.S. The real reason I refused to join the raid is my squad was flying on the Axis side and the only fighters available were the Zero or the Bf-109T. And neither was my style of fighter.
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"There seems to be something wrong with our bloody ships today" Vice Admiral David Beatty, May 31st, North Sea near Jutland |
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#10 | |
Eternal Patrol
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“Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo |
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#11 | |
Ocean Warrior
![]() Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Carmel, Indiana
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Since I was in the Air Force, I have to agree with Sailor Steve.
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Irish1958 ![]() |
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#12 |
Stowaway
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The original question realy could have asked:
Why isn't the Regular Army as good as the Navy's Army (Uncle Sam's Misguided Children)? |
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#13 |
Ace of the Deep
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Location: Los Angeles, Ca
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My partner at work for 20 years was a Marine......And I always said, "John, I was in the Marines too....The Real Marines...........Submarines"........."DBF"
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#14 | |
Ocean Warrior
![]() Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Carmel, Indiana
Posts: 3,250
Downloads: 320
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Of course, the marines do some of this, but they are really a quick strike force intended to be mobile.
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Irish1958 ![]() |
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#15 |
Eternal Patrol
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The Amiral and the General were in the barber shop, getting a haircut and a shave. When the the barber started to put his best aftershave on the General, he held up his hand and said "None for me, thanks! My wife will think I've been in a whorehouse."
"You can go ahead and douse me with the stuff", replied the Admiral. "My wife doesn't know what a whorehouse smells like."
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“Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo |
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