Ever travelled by train?

Jimbuna · 03-07-09, 05:06 PM

A man was sitting on a London train eating a bag of fresh prawns, ripping off the heads and shells and then throwing them out of the window. After he had gobbled a few of them down an older woman opposite him said, "Would you mind not doing that? It's disgusting to watch.".

"Listen love." He replied, "It's got nothing to do with you, I've paid my fare for this journey and I'll do what I damn well want on this train." He carried on ripping off the shells, throwing them out of the window and eating the prawns. Finally he finished the bag and settled back for a little sleep.

The woman then started some knitting and all the man could hear while he was trying to sleep was the incessant clicking of her knitting needles. After a while, he sits back up and says to the woman, "Could you stop that noise, can't you see I'm trying to sleep?" "It's got nothing to do with you," replies the old woman, "I've paid my fare and I'll do what I want on this train."

At that, the man grabbed the woman's knitting and threw it out of the window. The woman immediately stood up and pulled the train alarm cord. The man burst out laughing and said, "Ha ha, you'll get fined 200 pounds for that!"

To which the old woman replied, "And you'll get six years when they smell your fingers...."

XabbaRus · 03-07-09, 05:24 PM

Ok took me a few seconds to get it but very funny..:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Oberon · 03-07-09, 05:28 PM

Lucky to have any opening windows on a lot of UK trains now

Good joke though

UnderseaLcpl · 03-07-09, 07:09 PM

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
People travelling on trains!? Hilarious!

rubenandthejets · 03-07-09, 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnderseaLcpl

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
People travelling on trains!? Hilarious!

Depends where you are, really....
Absolutelt SUPERB train service here in Japan-they run on time (to the second!), are clean, safe and cheap=and thats just the local trains! The inter city shinkanzen service is even better!

A Very Super Market · 03-07-09, 10:12 PM

Yep, Amtrak is utter hell, and Traincorp Japan is excellent.

Actually, Amtrak is pretty safe, but its a train....

Its like the 18oos when you ride in them.

India is worse though.

bookworm_020 · 03-07-09, 11:33 PM

Cityrail here in Sydney, Australia isn't much better. To be stuck next to an obese slob who ate too much garlic and curry and who has never used deodorant in his life is a regular occurrence. At lest I can travel up front with the driver now!

Then again, some of them aren't much better!

When I saw the title, I thought you were talking about great train journeys. I thinking about doing the Indian Pacific rail trip in the near future as I get a staff discount!

August · 03-08-09, 12:09 AM

I've taken the Amtrak from Providence to NYC a few times and ridden the MBTA lines to Boston but most of my train riding experience was on the Bundesbahn back in the late 70's, both on civilian passenger trains and military trains where we loaded our tracks on flatcars.

Of the latter one of the coolest rides was a two day run along the Rhine coming back from a Reforger in Northern Germany. Absolutely beautiful scenery.

rubenandthejets · 03-08-09, 05:51 AM

Tokyo to Hiroshima on the Shinkansen.

Read the paper, take a few photos of Fujisan, have a couple of beers (sold by a delightfully demure and polite Japanese cabin attendent), smoke a few ciggies and "oh, are we here already?". Think I'll pop down to Kure and check out the 1/10 scale model of the "Yamato".

03-08-09, 05:59 AM

We have pretty good train system, especially the long distance ones. Only the capital, Helsinki, has a local tram & metro system. I like to ride on the metro, especially in London. For those who are interested, here's a site about abandoned London underground stations. I find that stuff interesting, especially the WW 2 era stuff.

Info on VR, the state train system provider of Finland and their trains.

Platapus · 03-08-09, 01:35 PM

I have always dreamed of taking one of two routes (maybe both?)

One is along the Northern Border of the US and Canada and the other is along the Southern Border of Canada and the US. I have seen pictures of the scenery and it looks wonderful.

One of these days, perhaps.

03-07-09, 05:06 PM	#1
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,501 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Ever travelled by train? A man was sitting on a London train eating a bag of fresh prawns, ripping off the heads and shells and then throwing them out of the window. After he had gobbled a few of them down an older woman opposite him said, "Would you mind not doing that? It's disgusting to watch.". "Listen love." He replied, "It's got nothing to do with you, I've paid my fare for this journey and I'll do what I damn well want on this train." He carried on ripping off the shells, throwing them out of the window and eating the prawns. Finally he finished the bag and settled back for a little sleep. The woman then started some knitting and all the man could hear while he was trying to sleep was the incessant clicking of her knitting needles. After a while, he sits back up and says to the woman, "Could you stop that noise, can't you see I'm trying to sleep?" "It's got nothing to do with you," replies the old woman, "I've paid my fare and I'll do what I want on this train." At that, the man grabbed the woman's knitting and threw it out of the window. The woman immediately stood up and pulled the train alarm cord. The man burst out laughing and said, "Ha ha, you'll get fined 200 pounds for that!" To which the old woman replied, "And you'll get six years when they smell your fingers...." __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!

03-07-09, 05:24 PM	#2
XabbaRus Navy Seal Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 5,330 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	Ok took me a few seconds to get it but very funny..:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: __________________

03-07-09, 07:09 PM	#4
UnderseaLcpl Silent Hunter Join Date: May 2008 Location: Storming the beaches! Posts: 4,254 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: People travelling on trains!? Hilarious! __________________ I stole this sig from Task Force

03-07-09, 10:12 PM	#6
A Very Super Market The Old Man Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Deep in the Wild Canadian suburbs. Posts: 1,468 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	Yep, Amtrak is utter hell, and Traincorp Japan is excellent. Actually, Amtrak is pretty safe, but its a train.... Its like the 18oos when you ride in them. India is worse though. __________________ The entire German garrison of Vanviken, right here in your thread!

03-07-09, 11:33 PM	#7
bookworm_020 Navy Seal Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Sinking ships off the Australian coast Posts: 5,966 Downloads: 1 Uploads: 0	Cityrail here in Sydney, Australia isn't much better. To be stuck next to an obese slob who ate too much garlic and curry and who has never used deodorant in his life is a regular occurrence. At lest I can travel up front with the driver now! Then again, some of them aren't much better! When I saw the title, I thought you were talking about great train journeys. I thinking about doing the Indian Pacific rail trip in the near future as I get a staff discount! __________________ "There is always one person in any organization who knows whats going on, That person must be fired"

03-07-09, 05:28 PM	#3
Oberon Lucky Jack Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 25,976 Downloads: 61 Uploads: 20	Lucky to have any opening windows on a lot of UK trains now Good joke though

03-08-09, 12:09 AM	#8
August Wayfaring Stranger Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 23,197 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	I've taken the Amtrak from Providence to NYC a few times and ridden the MBTA lines to Boston but most of my train riding experience was on the Bundesbahn back in the late 70's, both on civilian passenger trains and military trains where we loaded our tracks on flatcars. Of the latter one of the coolest rides was a two day run along the Rhine coming back from a Reforger in Northern Germany. Absolutely beautiful scenery. __________________ Flanked by life and the funeral pyre. Putting on a show for you to see.

03-08-09, 05:51 AM	#9
rubenandthejets 中国水兵 Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 279 Downloads: 20 Uploads: 0	Tokyo to Hiroshima on the Shinkansen. Read the paper, take a few photos of Fujisan, have a couple of beers (sold by a delightfully demure and polite Japanese cabin attendent), smoke a few ciggies and "oh, are we here already?". Think I'll pop down to Kure and check out the 1/10 scale model of the "Yamato". __________________ HMAS Sydney III "Thorough and Ready"

03-08-09, 05:59 AM	#10
OneToughHerring Stowaway Posts: n/a Downloads: Uploads:	We have pretty good train system, especially the long distance ones. Only the capital, Helsinki, has a local tram & metro system. I like to ride on the metro, especially in London. For those who are interested, here's a site about abandoned London underground stations. I find that stuff interesting, especially the WW 2 era stuff. Info on VR, the state train system provider of Finland and their trains.

03-08-09, 01:35 PM	#11
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 19,362 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	I have always dreamed of taking one of two routes (maybe both?) One is along the Northern Border of the US and Canada and the other is along the Southern Border of Canada and the US. I have seen pictures of the scenery and it looks wonderful. One of these days, perhaps. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.