Todays wisdom for the youth here

[SUBMAN1]

A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster
for his chicken coop. The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and
says,

'OK old fart, time for you to retire.'
The old rooster replies, 'Come on, surely you cannot handle
ALL of these chickens.
Look what it has done to me.
Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the
corner?'
The young rooster says,
'Beat it: You are washed up
and I am taking over.'
The old rooster says,
'I tell you what, young stud.
I will race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets the
exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop.' The young rooster laughs.
'You know you don't stand a chance, old man.
So, just to be fair,
I will give you a head start.'

The old rooster takes off running About 15 seconds later the
young rooster takes off running after him. They round the front porch of
the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap.

He is only about 5 feet behind the old rooster and gaining
fast.
The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch
when he sees the roosters running by.
The Old Rooster is squalking
and running as hard as he can.
The Farmer grabs his shotgun and
- BOOM -
he blows the young rooster to bits. The farmer sadly shakes his
head and says,
'Dammit.....
third gay rooster I bought this month.'

Moral of this story? ..

Don't mess with the OLD FARTS -
age, skill, wisdom, and a little treachery
always overcome youth and arrogance

[headcase]

Amen!

[Sailor Steve]

Old guy sittin' on his porch in a rural area sees a kid walkin' by dragging something behind him. "Hey, son, what'cha got there?"

"Got me some chicken-wire!" replies the boy.

"What'cha gonna do with that?" the old man asks.

"Gonna catch me some chickens!"

Don't be a fool, boy! You cain't catch chickens with chicken wire!"

Three hours later the boy comes walking back up the road with the wire unrolled behind him. Stuggling and squawking trapped in the wire are four prime hens.

Next day the boy comes walking by the farmhouse with something clutched in his hand. The old man says "What'cha got there son?"

"Got me some duck tape!"

"It's duct tape! What'cha plannin' on doin' with it?"

"Gonna catch me some ducks!"

"Why, that's just plain dumb and stupid, child! You can't catch ducks with duct tape!"

A couple of hours later the boy comes walking back up the road. Trailing behind him is twenty feet of duct tape wrapped around three ducks, quacking up a storm.

Next day the boy comes walking by the farmhouse. The old man says "What'cha got there, boy?"

"Got me some pussy willows!"

The old man slowly stands up from his chair and says "Hang on a minute, son! Let me get my hat!"





And the moral of that story is that sometimes somthing can be learned from the youngest of us.

[Frame57]

Funny stuff!:rotfl:

[SUBMAN1]

This farmer who was having a bit of a problem trying to get his hens to lay eggs. He went down to the feed store one day and discussed his problem with the owner.

The guy told him, "I have just the thing for you, wait right here." The feed store guy comes back a few minutes later with a rooster in a wooden crate. The farmer says, "I don't think that one rooster's gonna make any difference, I've got almost 2,000 chickens."

The feed store guy went on to explain that this was no ordinary rooster, this was "Brewster the Rooster," and he guaranteed this rooster would fix his problems. The farmer figured he had nothing to loose, so he took the rooster home with him and let him loose at the farm.

Well, that night there was quite a commotion in the ole henhouse! The farmer went into the henhouse to see what had happened and was startled to see all the chickens completely exhausted from the night's encounter with ole Brewster the Rooster. Well, the farmer just smiled and looked over at Brewster, who was dozing contently out in the barnyard.

The very next night, as soon as it got dark, there was more commotion in the chicken coops and the horses were raising Hell, too. In the morning, the farmer goes out and sees all the chickens "laying out" again and the horses could hardly move due to the work out they got from ole Brewster the Rooster.

The farmer kind of snickered and told the rooster, "Brewster, if you don't slow down, you just might kill yourself". Brewster did nothing but continue his well deserved nap. Well on the very next night, all Hell broke loose at the farm. The chickens, horses, cows, and sheep made such a racket that the farmer could hardly sleep.

In the morning, the farmer got up and surveyed the carnage. The chickens, horses, cows, and sheep were completely exhausted and the whole barnyard was torn up. Over by the chicken coop, the farmer spied Brewster, who was spread eagle on the ground and totally motionless, with some buzzards circling over him.

The farmer went over to Brewster and said, "Brewster, I told 'ya you better slow down, and now you've done it. You done got yourself killed!" Brewster picked his head up, opened one eye and said "Sshh...they're getting ready to land!"