Lawyers

[SUBMAN1]

A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper has cheated him out of ten million bucks.
His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that a deaf bookkeeper would not hear anything that he might have to testify about in court. When the Godfather goes to confront the bookkeeper about his missing $10 million, he brings along his attorney, who knows sign language. The Godfather tells the lawyer, "Ask him where the 10 million bucks he embezzled from me is." The attorney, using sign language, asks the bookkeeper where the money is.
The bookkeeper signs back: "I don't know what you are talking about." The attorney tells the Godfather: "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about."
The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to the bookkeeper's temple and says, "Ask him again!"
The attorney signs to the bookkeeper: "He'll kill you if you don't tell him!"
The bookkeeper signs back: "OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed in my cousin Enzo's backyard in Queens !"
The Godfather asks the attorney: "Well, what'd he say?"
The attorney replies: "He says you don't have the balls to pull the trigger"
Don't you just love lawyers?

[Sailor Steve]

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

That's a good one!

[bookworm_020]

I'm sending this to my wife, who works for lawyers!

[HunterICX]

:rotfl:Brilliant!
a good laugh

HunterICX

[AG124]

I'm a law student, but I still enjoy the occasional lawyer joke. Has anyone heard this one?

Ol' Fred was close to death, and hoped to take his money with him when he passed over to the other side. He called his three best friends (a minister, doctor and lawyer) together for a meeting, and told them of his plan. He gave each of them $30,000.00 in cash, which they were to place in envelopes in his coffin at his funeral in the hopes that he would be able to take it with him to heaven.

At the funeral, each of Ol' Fred's three friends placed an envelope in the coffin. Afterwards, the three of them were discussing their fond memories of their friend when the minister, looking guilty, announced he had a confession to make.

"Our church has had problems lately with a leaking roof, and if it got worse, our parishoners would have had no where to worship. It was such an important issue, I knoew Ol' Fred wouldn't mind. Before I put my envelope into his coffin, I removed $10,000.00 to pay for a new roof - my envelope only contained $20,000.00 cash."

The doctor then spoke up as well; "We needed new equipment at the local hospital, which could save many lives. I knew Ol' Fred would want to contribute to something as important as that, so I too removed some money from the envelope before putting it into the coffin - $20,000.00. I only put $10,000.00 cash into the envelope."

The lawyer looked shocked and angry. "I can't believe what I'm hearing. We all made a promise to carry out our friend's last wish, and he trusted us with that one final task. I am truly disappointed in all of you. When my envelope went into Ol' Fred's coffin, it contained my personal cheque to him for the full $30,000.00."

[Dowly]

:rotfl::rotfl:Nice ones!

[Sailor Steve]

Originally Posted by AG124

it contained my personal cheque to him for the full $30,000.00."

I heard that little gem sometime in the dim, dark past but had forgotten it. Thanks for reminding me.