[Brag]

Balz used an eye dropper to ration water. On the seventh day, we were all very thirsty. Some were getting delusional, especially the lookouts on duty, who kept seeing ships.
A few minutes before noon as Balz was to perform the eye drop ration hoochie woochie, P.O. Weber said, "Ship Spotted."
Balz looked through his glasses. "Everyone, start speaking Greek."
"Is it a Greek ship?" I asked.
"How do we speak Greek?" Bernard asked.
"Yasu Panayotis, Papadimitropolus, Metaxa, uzo Pireus Partenon Alexandropolis hoochie woochiepappas Salamis," Balz explained.
"What if we say it wrong?" I Asked.
"It doesn´t matter," Balz said. "The crew on that ship is Portuguese."

We did some serious waving and the tramp steamer, Boaventura, stopped fifty meters from us. I got hoisted up first in a bosun´s chair. Then Balz climbed up a Jacob's ladder.
"Bon dia," Balz said to the Portuguese captain, "Your papers, please."
"Papers?
| "Yes, your cargo, manifest, crew list, registration certificate, radio station license."
"You, coo-coo?"
"No, we are Greek. Inspecting ships for contraband is an old habit I acquired while speaking Spanish. My name is Balz, I am the greatest hero in the Spanish navy. That´s why they call me the Lion of Trafalgar."
The Portuguese capatain whose name was Fonseca scratched his head. "Ah, Trafalgar, did you meet Mr. Nelson, the admiral?"
"I´ve sunk the Nelson."
"Let me get you a glass of water. I have a nice guest cabin and the ship´s doctor will give you a pill." Fonseca took Balz by the elbow and led him aft.
"Water? Do you have any tea cozies on board?"
I wondered how long it would take Fonseca to radio the Royal Navy.






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