Quote:
Originally Posted by Diopos
And this is exactly the point where Mrs Mary Beth Hesnon, Corporate Media Relations Manager at Ubisoft's Worldwide Headquarters, stoped reading it ... 
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I have to agree. You have to think of this letter as a persuasive argument. Your opening statement is everything. It has to intrigue the reader to read further.
The opening statement was poor, it did not garner intrigue or interest. The rest, as a result, can be summarized as "TLDR". Your opening statement makes or breaks the rest.
OP, you have to remember, your writing to a big corporation, that gets a ton of emails to sift through. IMO, you needed to be Clear, concise, to the point, yet heartfelt. It shouldn't have been larger then two or three paragraphs. (edit: maybe 3 or 4, but certainly not a 2 page essay)
I would be very surprised if you got anything but a canned response back, if any response at all.