This Is Why I Don't Date Girls...
 

FYI I am not gay, I'm just venting my frustration with women

So recently, I decided to try and start a relationship with a girl at my school. She is rather shy and I'm basically carrying the entire conversation. I had feelings for her, and I think she did too actually. Then all hell broke loose.

On Friday night I receive a text from her friend (let's call her S) saying that my crush (let's call her C) likes me. Of course, I am suspicious at first since I have been duped in the past, and then I get on a video call with S and C, S loudly says C likes me, which then C says "SHUT UP". Well, I spill my beans, and guess what? It's a trick. I find this out and say some nasty stuff, which then C and S start apologizing, I forgive them and we reconcile.

Then, as Friday night is ending, C is sending me some positive signals, so I think all is going well.
On Saturday I proceed to question S and C as to whose idea it was. And you know what bullcrap I get? I never said anything, it must have been you. and I show them the screenshots I took of that conversation and they repeat the same thing, and every single time I ask them who said it, they said "It was you." One time S told me that she doesn't like talking to people, and I was wondering who sent this and so I ask C if it was her (since they were at S's home that night) and I get the same She never said it, you did I then ask them if they were trying to imply something to me, which then S says I'm trying to say I am dead, dead serious. Now they are trying to avoid my questions and are playing games with me.
Sunday and Saturday are the repeats of the same thing, and on Sunday I get some more positive signals from C, I hope for the best on Monday and go to bed.

On Monday she is again playing mind games with me as I try to develop a relationship with her. I am thinking about letting go but I do not want to give up just yet, so I have this raging internal debate that disrupts my home life. Finally, after having a talk with my counselor I send C a long message describing why I am leaving this relationship. My main points are: 1, you are playing mind games with me and I still have not received any clarity from what happened on Friday. 2, You are causing serious amounts of emotional troubles for me with these games, and so it is not a healthy relationship, then I also send her all the screenshots I have of her and her friend saying it was me who said what they said to me. I gave her a nice kick in the gut and blocked her, I also said if she wanted to remain, friends, that she was to go through S to try to get me to unblock her. After I sent all of this, her last message she sent me before I blocked her was "Boy" (which usually means I am doing something stupid, which I wasn't) Now that the ball is in my court and I have control I finally get them to play by my terms.

S immediately texts me saying that "C wants to be friends, so unblock her." and I said, "Not until I know who's idea it was and why you were saying it was me who said that C liked me."

I say, "It wasn't me who said that C liked me." And y'know what S says? "I know, I was joking." I wish I could show you the screenshots as to how I knew they were trying to get past my questions and play with me. I said some pretty nasty stuff along the lines of "That was a horrible joke you prick, look what happens when you pull stunts like this!!!"
Classic man-user, " I was just joking". :nope:

I then said that C would have to talk to me at school. And S tells me that C said "Boy no". Then I said "Well then guess what? she doesn't want to be friends. If she is only willing to be friends over text and not in real life at school then she is using me." Then S says "C doesn't like talking to people, sooo" which I then say "Wouldn't you say that communication is important to having a friendship?" and she says, "No, me and C talk in morse code." I then said "Oh really, so you are joking when you say she doesn't like talking to people?" and I get a definitive "No" from S.


Then I finally ask "Who's idea was it?" S says, "It wasn't C's fault." and then I say "Oh really then, who's fault is it?" and then S says "Your mom." Which I then give up and say "Alright, bye to each of you. I give up, see what your little games do to people? Not cool." I then proceeded to take screenshots of the chat so that way I could defend myself if need be. Finally, after all that was over, I remove S and C and block them. Now my life is peaceful.

In short:
My crush and her friend play mind games with me and then act all childish when I call them out on it, and when I leave my crush she desperately tries to get me back. But they are gonna use me again so I leave them.


I won't date girls for awhile now, lol.

Yikes, glad I'm an old fart. I've no advice beyond don't let it get the best of you as there will be other women.

Secretly I've always wondered what would happen if guys just stopped falling all over themselves trying to impress women and collectively just ignored them.

yeah that’s what i did. there are other kens out there. Sometimes i just want to ignore all the women in my grade, they can be a little annoying.

it’s pretty much over now, let’s just see if she says anything at school or over email to me. :hmmm:

lol you're on too them. Take 'S' on a date that will get 'C' mad at her. Then while they're fighting each, you dump them both. WINNER!

I think you're a glutton for punishment!! :doh: I would have left C after a couple of days of trying to figure her out. :hmmm:
Don't let the immaturity of some spoil it for you, there is an old saying "Plenty of fish in the sea".
All the best for the future!! :yep:

Yes, let's. ;)



Forget her, man. You will look back on this and kick yourself for how much time you've wasted already. There is a nice, beautiful girl out there who wants to have a real relationship with you. Don't keep her waiting. Find her. And don't stop [for too long] until you do.

Uh,...

Rockstar is really Charlie Sheen...?... :o


http://anthillonline.com/wp-content/...inning-Duh.jpg






<O>

Some advice from an Old Guy:


If there is one thing that all women have in common is that they are all different. Clearly, this woman was not the one for you at this time. One down, that leaves about 3,000,000,000 other women out there.


I am sorry this happened to you but I am also glad that you recognized the situation soon.



https://cdn.someecards.com/someecard...8f18867056.png

Thank you guys, i’ve pretty much moved on now. Yes there are plenty of other fish in the sea, and i will find one. She was a nasty barracuda though, yuck.

Rockstar, that would be a good idea only if they still liked me, i’m pretty sure they hate my guts now and are looking for revenge. I wonder what rumors will be spreading at school, lol.

thank you all for the advice though, seriously.

The real fun is experienced whilst trying to find the right one.

pretty much, lol.

For your sake I hope the Lady of the Manor doesn't see that post!
:doh:

Jim isn't afraid. He is a hearty breed. But, in case I'm wrong. This is for you Jim. It's the man song :haha:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7Y0I91rubg



lyrics for those not of the English vernacular.


Ladies and Gentlemen,
The Man Song!
(He's the man!)
(He's the man!)
I don't take no crap from anybody
[else but you]
I wear the pants around here
[when I finish with your laundry]
Coz I'm a guy you don't wanna fight
[When I say "Jump", you say "Yeah right!"]
I'm the man of this house
[until you get home]
(He's the man!)
(He's the man!)


What I say goes around here
[right out the window]
and I don't wanna hear a lot of whining
[so I'll shut up]
The sooner you learn who's Boss around here
[The sooner you can give me my orders, dear]
Coz I'm Head-Honcho around here
[but it's all in my head]
(He's the man!)
(He's the man!)
And I can have sex anytime
[that you want it]
Coz I'm a man who has needs
[but there not that important]
And don't expect any flowers from me
[Coz if I'm not mistaken you prefer jewelry]
I'm the King of my castle
[when you're not around]


He's the man!)
(He's the man!)
And I'll drink and watch sports whenever I wanna
[get in trouble]
And I'll come home when I'm good and ready
[to sleep on the couch]
Coz a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do
[And I'm gonna do what you tell me to]
Because I'm Top dog around here
[but I've been neutered]
(He's the man!)
(He's the man!)
(You the man!)

She probably wrote it wnen I was out :)

All three are not worth your time or effort. None are dating material nor marriage material for that matter. You deserve better.

C has failed the dating game miserably.

Become a gray rock and ghost them. Don't do the pick me dance. It is a weak move and seen as such.

Yeah she failed pretty bad on her own, but S made it even worse by doing what she did.

They didn’t talk to me at school at all, though they did eye me in the hallways. I’ve left them already and they are going to find someone else for sure. I won’t go out with a woman like that in any circumstance. What a sadistic woman though.

I like Rockstar's plan a lot :har:

But Sean C has the best advice for you: Miss Right is somewhere out there and you'll know her because she'll treat you right... with respect and love. These two females are just a couple of nerds having fun yanking your chain :yep:

Experience has taught me a woman's worst enemy is another woman. In cases like this, knowing that could work to your advantage. :03:

Rockstars plan would totally work for me under other circumstances. It would be like setting off the Tsar Bomba lol.
The woman that’s right for me seems to be far away, heck maybe i even know her or have met her before. We don’t know until i decide to pursue a relationship with that a woman. These two girls were inexperienced nerdy females in the area of dating too, evidenced by their behavior, :haha:

LOL yep, tbh I thought at first that S was lying to C about what I was saying to try to get me away from C and i would start to pursue S. They all played a role in me ghosting them, lol. S made it 200% worse for both of them lol.

First off, I am sorry for your experience. Don't dwell on it - consider it water under the bridge and a learning experience. You learned how deceptive some women can be, even if they try to hide it with a "nice", "shy" exterior. And in the future, these mind games will not work on you. Good job calling them out on their behavior.

Dating in this decade is completely different from what it was like for our parents. Or even for our older brothers and sisters. It's a lot harder out there.

My mom & dad grew up in a small town where everyone knew everyone; people naturally paired off thru church/high school at 19 or 20, & then got married. No internet or social media. These days? You are competing with Tinder, Bumble, Match, a girl's social media followers, etc etc. Even an average woman may have hundreds of clingy men "simping" & desperate for her attention online.

My theory is that this whole thing was, in fact, about attention. The girl and her friend were seeking attention/validation from you. Once they got that ego boost, they had what they wanted. Don't feel ashamed. It says nothing about your value as a young man; it DOES say a lot about their lack of character.

"These two females are just a couple of nerds having fun yanking your chain " - EXACTLY.

I strongly recommend that you seek out youtube channels devoted to young men's issues and dating for men. There you can learn about female psychology, relationship red flags, how to cut out women who lead you on, and how to protect yourself as a man from modern dating pitfalls. These can range from merely embarrassing (harsh rejections, mean rumors) to extremely serious (baby traps, false abuse accusations, etc.)

There are no guarantees of course. This is not "magic" "pickup artist" stuff. What dating commenters CAN do is give psychiatric & self improvement techniques beneficial to you in the dating world and beyond.

By learning HOW to date instead of "winging it" I was able to date a woman I would have never approached & considered "out of my league" when I was younger. :up: This did not come naturally to me. But now, I know to keep things in perspective, and to learn from each encounter I have.