Should i ask her that question? [Archive]

Kapitan

06-01-06, 08:22 AM

Ive been down lately i lost my girl friend but she still talks to me and i still love her and she still has feelings for me.
i split up with her a few months ago and now i regret it and she knows it, were young but unhappy so i want some advice should i ask that question?

for the not so intelligent people that question is will you marry me

Skybird

06-01-06, 08:28 AM

What question? I see none in the poll.

Kapitan

06-01-06, 08:30 AM

The poll should have yes and no as options my question is should i ask her to marry me?

Skybird

06-01-06, 08:36 AM

Oh, I see. Maybe you are better served with a poll asking if it is wise to leave that question to other people to decide, instead of leaving it to yourself? ;) You are the one living y<our life, and you will have to deal with the consequences - not anyone of us. Leave the effort of finding an answer to that question where it belongs - leave it with you. Some things in life we must decide all alone by ourselves.

That you ask that in public tells something on how sure you are that doing it would the right thing to do. That is the only answer that I have for you. ;)

jumpy

06-01-06, 09:06 AM

I would say NO m8.
Simply due to the fact that:
i split up with her a few months ago and now i regret it and she knows it, were young but unhappy You must have done that for a reason and as you are both young....
If the BIG question is on your mind, then think about getting back together as a couple for a while before you even consider shackling yourself to a ball and chain for the rest of your life.
Many ppl see being asked to marry as something really major and not at all to be taken lightly (I'm not suggesting this is otherwise for you..), so from that point of view it's probably best to not just spring the question on her considering you have been separated for a couple of months.
Another thing to think about, don't take this the wrong way; have you seriously thought about what it is that you miss about her? If you have been feeling down lately is that because you miss her or just the companionship of a relationship? Difficult questions I know, but you have to ask yourself this truthfully when you think about what it is you are contemplating doing.

Personally I have never been able to stay 'friends' with an ex, it's just too hard to deal with on an even keel. Better to make a clean break and not let the feelings drag on and on. I suspect that this is what you are experiencing now...

Abraham

06-01-06, 09:14 AM

I voted no, although after reading Skybird's answer I wonder if I should have voted at all.
Getting married may be fun but staying married is a difficult task and not a paracetamol against relational problems.

Konovalov

06-01-06, 09:22 AM

There are really only two people who are likely to know the answer to such a question and they are yourself and your ex. Whatever you do, do not rush or make a hasty decision. Good luck. :up:

bradclark1

06-01-06, 09:35 AM

If you have to question yourself the answer is no.
Trust me when you are ready to spend your life with that one person you will know it.

lesrae

06-01-06, 09:36 AM

Getting married may be fun but staying married is a difficult task and not a paracetamol against relational problems.

Amen.

Drebbel

06-01-06, 09:39 AM

The poll should have yes and no as options my question is should i ask her to marry me?

Nope, nothing will hurt her more than knowing you did not love her enough to decide for yourself !

So do not ask her and do not marry her !

STEED

06-01-06, 11:28 AM

Hit the bottle get drunk then sober up and move on, sorry Kap if that sounds cold.

TLAM Strike

06-01-06, 12:35 PM

Ancient Chinese wisdom say: Girlfriend is bottle of wine, wife is a wine bottle.

Ass Hole American say: You chugged the bottle buddy.

Translation: If you were unhappy as Boyfriend and Girlfriend what makes you think your will be happy as Husband and Wife?

Sailor Steve

06-01-06, 12:41 PM

I had a friend who wanted to get back with his ex-girlfriend. He came to me for advice. I reminded him of how all he did when they were together was complain.

Bottom line: only you can look back and see the relationship for what it was. Only you can answer the question. Only you can live your life. Either way you may regret it; either way you might end up happy.

You make the choice, and you live with it. Or don't.

Oh, and I declined to vote.

StdDev

06-01-06, 12:46 PM

I did not vote because like others I think it is not appropriate.. but I will offer advice.. just remember that this advice is from someone you dont really know and keep in mind what you paid for it..

You are young.. when you get married you want it to be for the rest of your life (ie. until you are very old!)

You should be out prowlin about for your next Ex!

squigian

06-01-06, 01:36 PM

If you told us of the root issues in your relationship, we would have an easier time of giving advice. As we know, internet fellows are never wrong :yep:

August

06-01-06, 01:48 PM

My only advice is to live together for at least a year before contemplating matrimony. Nothing tests the survivability of a relationship than cohabitation.

CB..

06-01-06, 02:59 PM

"scientific studys" have shown that there is no such thing as "just good friends" after a break up-- no matter what the female partner/ex partner may say-- it's a nice thought- but it is destructive usually to persue a relationship once it has been openly ended--you can say hello down the pub- you don't have to strangle each other on sight- but that's really it--
alledgdly--
we've all been there--gawd have we all been there lol-- no thanks
i vote no a million times over-- there should be an age limit on getting married anyhuw--of at least 30 IMO --- save a lot of bother all round--

joea

06-01-06, 03:48 PM

Some good advice, you are young you will survive. :up:

Linton

06-01-06, 04:43 PM

As a married man of 16 years standing I would go with steed.You are are a young chap and a bit of paper and a ring will never make the difference if something was wrong.Wait until you have established yourself in life job etc before asking a woman to spend the rest of her life with you and with the csa in the uk make sure you dont leave lots of cash hungry women pregnant.To quote Al Pacino I am giving you pearls here!

kiwi_2005

06-01-06, 05:11 PM

Kapitan. NO.

If yous are always breaking up, getting married is not going to stop the break ups. Instead of breaking up it will be divorce and a failed marriage. Best thing is to live together for a while see how you both go, living under the same roof, if things are still roses after a year and ya both still madly in love then tie the knot. Marriage is a serious move you both must be ready for it. Its not a game. :D

Anyways if you do all the best.:rock::up:

PeriscopeDepth

06-01-06, 06:06 PM

You're about 18 for chrissakes, no!

PD

Skybird

06-01-06, 07:36 PM

Eighteen...? I was not aware of that. So finally you get a clear answer from me as well: No!

Sharkstooth

06-01-06, 10:41 PM

I didn't vote cause I hope you wouldn't be crazy nuff to decide something like this on the results of a poll........
but.......
no, no, no a thousand times NO.
Sounds to me like you 'settling' for getting married cause well, you still love her, and nothin better happening..... ack.

besides.......why get married and drive one woman crazy when you can be single and drive lots of them crazy. :cool:

JScones

06-02-06, 02:04 AM

If you have to question yourself the answer is no.
Trust me when you are ready to spend your life with that one person you will know it.
:yep: Agreed.

XabbaRus

06-02-06, 05:06 AM

I say no.

But why do you have to ask a question like this on a forum?

Says a lot more in very little.

Kapitan

06-02-06, 05:42 AM

Why did i ask simple because i wanted other peoples opinion, id rather go in knowing than jump in at the deep end.

Sir Big Jugs

06-02-06, 11:02 AM

Just poppin' in to check out the new forum software!;)

SUBMAN1

06-02-06, 12:51 PM

If you have to question yourself the answer is no.
Trust me when you are ready to spend your life with that one person you will know it.
Best damn advice in this whole thread. If you question it, even in the slightest, it will not ever work.

-S

PS. Regardless what other people say, everyone here should vote no for this very reason. Right now you are just missing something that isn't there anymore, but there are much bigger fish to fry around the next corner! I can remeber feeling like this many years ago about my real first love, but looking back now, I see how that was so wrong an idea. I upgraded many time over since then! :P

If I could redo my life, I would have been so much smarter! :P

Terrax

06-02-06, 12:57 PM

For me, that was the really bad part about being 18. Everything was amplified. Love, hate, joy, rage, ect. When things were good with my girlfriend, I was on top of the world. When things were bad, I agonized over it and life was terrible.

You feel bad now, but how will you feel if you ask and she tells you no? Breakups are like horrible hangovers, they take time to get over. The sooner you start getting over it the better. Unfortunately, this will not be the last time you feel this way. It's all part of growing up. You're not ready for this, and most likely, neither is she.

The Noob

06-02-06, 04:01 PM

SUBMAN1

06-02-06, 05:41 PM

After 30, life is already over IMHO. You are too young to die, but too old to do something that takes time.

Why all you people are so negative anyway?

I 100% agree with bradclark1!

Go have a Vodka and forget it, life goes on.;)
Whats wrong with after 30? I'd hate to have to go through the teens or 20's again. Life is much more comfortable after 30! :up: You can have pretty much anything you want at that time, and you are old enough to have respect of the 40 somethings, yet still cool enough to hang out with 20 somethings if you need to (Not sure why you'd want to though! ;) Just kidding!), and smart enough to understand that even though you thought you knew everything at 20, you realize you don't know crap at 30 and will never know a fraction of what there is to know no matter how old you get (Though I make my best attempt at it)!

The old term - Full of Piss and Vinegar probably applies to this thread now! :p

If I could stop at any age and maintain that age forever, I'd have to pick early 30's.

-S

Kapitan_Phillips

06-02-06, 07:39 PM

Dude, this isnt something you put in a poll, in my opinion. "68% of salty submarine skippers think I should marry you" isnt exactly romantic ;)

Seriously though, I'd give it a bit of time.

Kurushio

06-02-06, 08:39 PM

Women are like fish...they smell of tuna. Can you tell one tuna from another?

Sea Demon

06-02-06, 10:28 PM

so i want some advice should i ask that question?

for the not so intelligent people that question is will you marry me

No. :dead:

kiwi_2005

06-03-06, 12:56 AM

Kapitan,
let me send over one of my escorts and help ya sort out your mind ;)

And what is important is im giving her to ya for free! :lol:

http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c387/mischazion/Dutch_Girl_1.jpg

http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c387/mischazion/Dutch_Girl.jpg

:arrgh!:

Onkel Neal

06-03-06, 01:06 AM

Nose to nose, your toes are in it;
Toes to toes, your nose is in it :-j

Is that for real?

kiwi_2005

06-03-06, 01:22 AM

Is that for real?

If you mean the tall blonde all i know is shes from holland. Maybe the dutch subsimmers will know more.

Gizzmoe

06-03-06, 01:38 AM

Whats wrong with after 30?
The Noob is 15 years old, in his eyes we are already dead... :lol:

Iceman

06-03-06, 02:42 AM

Tongue Twister

A guy with a black eye boards his plane bound for Pittsburgh and sits down in his seat. He immediately notices that the guy next to him also has a black eye.

He says to him, "Hey this is a coincidence: we both have black eyes. Mind if I ask how you got yours?"

So the guy tells him: "Well, it just happened. It was a tongue twister accident, sort of. See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the biggest breasts in the world was there. So, instead of saying: I'd like a ticket to Pittsburgh, I said: I'd like a picket to Tittsburgh." "She socked me one."

The first guy responded, "Mine was a tongue twister too."
"I was at the breakfast table and I wanted to say to my wife: Please pour me a bowl of Corn Flakes, but I accidentally said: You ruined my life, you lousy bitch.''

You Decide...:hmm:

Takeda Shingen

06-03-06, 06:07 AM

This thread reads like an episode of the Dr. Phil show. Will we be having an intervention next?

STEED

06-03-06, 08:33 AM

The Noob is 15 years old, in his eyes we are already dead... :lol:

Hello from beyond the grave. :lol:

cowman1009

06-03-06, 10:34 AM

This thread reads like an episode of the Dr. Phil show. Will we be having an intervention next?

I really hope so.....then we can fix the other problems of the world. Here's my 2 cents Kaptain....we tend to realize the mistakes that we have made after the fact for a reason...to learn and move on. Stay friends with her and if it is meant to be then who knows what can happen. But until then just enjoy life; you have alot of it in front of you :yep:

Skybird

06-03-06, 11:10 AM

Hello from beyond the grave. :lol:
We're Highlanders! :lol:

STEED

06-03-06, 11:14 AM

We're Highlanders! :lol:
:rotfl: :up:

The Noob

06-03-06, 01:49 PM

"68% of salty submarine skippers think I should marry you" isnt exactly romantic ;)

:rotfl::rotfl:

The Noob

06-03-06, 01:51 PM

Whats wrong with after 30? I'd hate to have to go through the teens or 20's again. Life is much more comfortable after 30! :up: You can have pretty much anything you want at that time, and you are old enough to have respect of the 40 somethings, yet still cool enough to hang out with 20 somethings if you need to (Not sure why you'd want to though! ;) Just kidding!), and smart enough to understand that even though you thought you knew everything at 20, you realize you don't know crap at 30 and will never know a fraction of what there is to know no matter how old you get (Though I make my best attempt at it)!

The old term - Full of Piss and Vinegar probably applies to this thread now! :p

If I could stop at any age and maintain that age forever, I'd have to pick early 30's.

-S

Maybe Correct...:hmm:

Abraham

06-05-06, 12:45 AM

After 30, life is already over IMHO...;)
Ooops, I just died (in your humble opinion)!
:rotfl:

retired1212

06-05-06, 01:03 AM

Just don't be in hurry. Be honest with her and with yourself :)

Women are like fish...they smell of tuna.

Only if Adam's cave is not clean enough

Edit: Just saw the pics of tall women in this thread. Man, I like women over 180cms :oops: