Fired from work

[Jimbuna]

The boss had to fire somebody, and he narrowed it down to one of two people, Debra or Jack.
It was an impossible decision because they were both super workers.
Rather than flip a coin, he decided he would fire the first one who used the coffee machine the next morning.
Debra came in the next morning with a horrible hangover after partying all night. She went to the coffee machine to take an aspirin.
The boss approached her and said: 'Debra, I've never done this before but I have to lay you or Jack off.'
'Could you jack off?' she says. 'I feel like sh!t.

<I apologise if some of you have problems reading this because of your board settings....but what colour is the best one to choose?)

[Tchocky]

Thread title had me thinking you were jobless, jim :)

[Jimbuna]

Thread title had me thinking you were jobless, jim :)

Not just yet :lol:

[nikimcbee]

The boss had to fire somebody, and he narrowed it down to one of two people, Debra or Jack.
It was an impossible decision because they were both super workers.
Rather than flip a coin, he decided he would fire the first one who used the coffee machine the next morning.
Debra came in the next morning with a horrible hangover after partying all night. She went to the coffee machine to take an aspirin.
The boss approached her and said: 'Debra, I've never done this before but I have to lay you or Jack off.'
'Could you jack off?' she says. 'I feel like sh!t.

<I apologise if some of you have problems reading this because of your board settings....but what colour is the best one to choose?)

I didn't know co-workers in The Crown were so easy.:rotfl:

[nikimcbee]

...and to think, I was going to send you some money because you lost your job.:rotfl: :dead:

[kranz]

: 'Debra, I've never done this before but I have to lay you or Jack off.'
'Could you jack off?' she says. 'I feel like sh!t.

someone pls explain me the word-game here coz I don't get it(but I wanna laugh)


<I apologise if some of you have problems reading this because of your board settings....but what colour is the best one to choose?)

no, I won't forgive you this time Jimbuna...

[nikimcbee]

: 'Debra, I've never done this before but I have to lay you or Jack off.'
'Could you jack off?' she says. 'I feel like sh!t.

someone pls explain me the word-game here coz I don't get it(but I wanna laugh)


<I apologise if some of you have problems reading this because of your board settings....but what colour is the best one to choose?)

no, I won't forgive you this time Jimbuna...

I'll let Jim explain that one.:up: :oops:

[SteamWake]

look if you have to explain the joke its already too late. ;)

[Jimbuna]

I'll try, see if I got it right...
in the context, "I have to lay you or Jack off" = "I have to fire you or Jack", with "laying ... off" = firing (from a job)

but ... "lay you" alone could mean "sleeping with you", and "jack off" alone = jerk off = masturbate.

edit: great one :lol:

Precisely mate....excellent explanation :up:

Looks like you've also educated old mcbee into the bargain :lol:

[kranz]

I didn't know that jack off=jerk off. Now it is so funny!:-j

[FIREWALL]

Don't worry ! You'll make a fortune as a joke writer.

That was hilarious. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

[SteamWake]

Like the old joke

"If Jack helps you off the horse will you help Jack off the horse?"