The joke thread II - Page 131

Eisenwurst · 06-12-20, 04:35 AM

Caesar and Brutus got a take away pizza.

When they got home Caesar noticed there were 2 slices missing.

He turns to Brutus and says...........

Platapus · 06-12-20, 05:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Catfish

I did not get the Euripides etc. joke, whatever i pronounce it it never makes sense.
"You rye pie dees" pronounced in english?
In german it would pronounce Oi ree pee das.
So something with Pee? Pi? -> confused

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eisenwurst

OK.....

"Euripides?" - did you rip these?

"Eumenides?" - you mend these?

......my university education was not wasted.

Yes it is is a dialect joke which seldom translates well

Euripides - you rip a dese - you rip a these - you rip these.

Eumendies - you mend a deses - you mend a these - you mend these

Dialect jokes rarely translate well across languages.

Platapus · 06-12-20, 05:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eisenwurst

Caesar and Brutus got a take away pizza.

When they got home Caesar noticed there were 2 slices missing.

He turns to Brutus and says...........

I would imagine he would have said
Éklepses tin pítsa mou?

Eisenwurst · 06-12-20, 06:21 AM

Actually it's not that sophisticated.

He just said " Et Tu Brutus?" .......you had to be there, as they say.

Catfish · 06-12-20, 06:32 AM

re EW: .. ate two, Brute ..
edit ok too late

and thanks for the explanations

Catfish · 06-12-20, 06:34 AM

I wonder why i always got two in Rome, when i ordered Martini

Jimbuna · 06-12-20, 10:32 AM

A hypnotist was brutally attacked on stage yesterday after he instructed a member of the audience to pretend to be a lion.

Jimbuna · 06-12-20, 10:34 AM

Went shopping last week to try and find some camouflage trousers, couldn’t find any.

Col7777 · 06-12-20, 11:16 AM

Sargent said to Paddy, "I didn't see you at camouflage training this morning," Paddy replied, "Oh thank you sir."

Eisenwurst · 06-12-20, 11:43 PM

Some bloke just told me I have no culture. Hah I told him. Michaelangelo didn't paint the Sistine Chapel ceiling all by himself, he had his 3 brothers to help him.

Jimbuna · 06-13-20, 04:46 AM

I went to a psychic the other day and asker her if I was gonna go to jail in the future….. She said no so I robbed her.

Jimbuna · 06-13-20, 04:48 AM

Since his release on bail Oscar Pistorious has decided to spend the weekend clay pigeon shooting to relax. So far he’s accidentally killed 2 elephants and shot a Jeep that was on safari.

Catfish · 06-13-20, 11:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimbuna

Since his release on bail Oscar Pistorious has decided to spend the weekend clay pigeon shooting to relax. So far he’s accidentally killed 2 elephants and shot a Jeep that was on safari.

And I guess they were all in his lavatory, with the door closed..

Jimbuna · 06-13-20, 12:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Catfish

And I guess they were all in his lavatory, with the door closed..

Pure coincidence or so he reckons

Col7777 · 06-14-20, 03:12 AM

The inventor of the Slot Machine tried for months to work out how to make it work and then finally the Penny dropped.

06-12-20, 04:35 AM	#1951
Eisenwurst Silent Hunter Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 3,621 Downloads: 58 Uploads: 0	Caesar and Brutus got a take away pizza. When they got home Caesar noticed there were 2 slices missing. He turns to Brutus and says........... __________________

06-12-20, 06:21 AM	#1954
Eisenwurst Silent Hunter Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 3,621 Downloads: 58 Uploads: 0	Actually it's not that sophisticated. He just said " Et Tu Brutus?" .......you had to be there, as they say. __________________

06-12-20, 06:32 AM	#1955
Catfish Dipped Squirrel Operative Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: ..where the ocean meets the sky Posts: 16,897 Downloads: 38 Uploads: 0	re EW: .. ate two, Brute .. edit ok too late and thanks for the explanations __________________ >^..^<)))>{ All generalizations are wrong. Last edited by Catfish; 06-12-20 at 08:27 AM.*

06-12-20, 06:34 AM	#1956
Catfish Dipped Squirrel Operative Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: ..where the ocean meets the sky Posts: 16,897 Downloads: 38 Uploads: 0	I wonder why i always got two in Rome, when i ordered Martini __________________ >^..^<*)))>{ All generalizations are wrong.

06-12-20, 10:32 AM	#1957
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	A hypnotist was brutally attacked on stage yesterday after he instructed a member of the audience to pretend to be a lion. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-12-20, 10:34 AM	#1958
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Went shopping last week to try and find some camouflage trousers, couldn’t find any. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-12-20, 11:16 AM	#1959
Col7777 Grey Wolf Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Manchester UK Posts: 944 Downloads: 260 Uploads: 0	Sargent said to Paddy, "I didn't see you at camouflage training this morning," Paddy replied, "Oh thank you sir." __________________ Silent and Violent

06-12-20, 11:43 PM	#1960
Eisenwurst Silent Hunter Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 3,621 Downloads: 58 Uploads: 0	Some bloke just told me I have no culture. Hah I told him. Michaelangelo didn't paint the Sistine Chapel ceiling all by himself, he had his 3 brothers to help him. __________________

06-13-20, 04:46 AM	#1961
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	I went to a psychic the other day and asker her if I was gonna go to jail in the future….. She said no so I robbed her. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-13-20, 04:48 AM	#1962
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,344 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Since his release on bail Oscar Pistorious has decided to spend the weekend clay pigeon shooting to relax. So far he’s accidentally killed 2 elephants and shot a Jeep that was on safari. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

06-14-20, 03:12 AM	#1965
Col7777 Grey Wolf Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Manchester UK Posts: 944 Downloads: 260 Uploads: 0	The inventor of the Slot Machine tried for months to work out how to make it work and then finally the Penny dropped. __________________ Silent and Violent