Dear Steve Thread

[Father Goose]

Excuse me, Dr. Steve.
Lt. Goose, Admiral Armistead's aide. I realize LCDR Williams has been through a terrible ordeal and his statements are barely coherent. As a result, I am delivering this transcript from the court records in an attempt to clarify the patient's status here at your office.

Here it is sir.

Originally Posted by Armistead

It is the order of this court that LCDR Eugene D. Williams be relieved of command of the USS Grenadier and that he is to be admitted to Subsim Psychiatric Hospital and placed under the care of Dr. Steve O.L.D.

LCDR Eugene D. Williams can only return to combat status with the written approval of Dr. Steve O.L.D. and accept mission given by Admiral Armistead.

LCDR Eugene D. Williams can remain a member of Subsim, but in low standing.

Dr. Steve, as you can see the court has ordered:
1) LCDR Williams relieved from his command on the USS Grenadier. DONE
2) LCDR Williams be admitted to the Subsim Psychiatric Hospital and placed under your care. DONE
3) LCDR Williams remains a member of low-standing of Subsim. DONE

The only issue remaining sir is, if and when you decide after evaluation, diagnosis, prognosis, treatments, injections, shock therapy, psychiatric sessions, and of course, after the patient pays his bill, if the patient is competent to return to combat duty. If that point is ever reached, the patient is ordered to report to Admiral Armistead for reassignment at the Admiral's discretion.

Admiral Armistead is fully aware that everything this patient experienced on his last patrol and based on his behavior before and during trial, that your treatment may take weeks, months, even years! The Admiral is not pushing you for a decison. The Admiral is confident LCDR Williams is in good hands and will receive the treatment he deserves.

Thank you sir.

[Armistead]

I cannot speak in or as for Admiral Armistead in my office capacity. Here I'm a mere employee.

[Father Goose]

Originally Posted by Armistead

I cannot speak in or as for Admiral Armistead in my office capacity. Here I'm a mere employee.

I understand that. I did note you had the same last name as the Admiral.
It's a nice office Dr. Steve has here. Any chance he treats "multiple personality disorder"?

[Armistead]

I see further charges have been made against LTJG Eugene D. Williams and under review by Admiral Armistead.

Armistead
Office Manager.

[Father Goose]

Dr. Steve...
Capt. Goose (I like the sound of that), Admiral Armistead's aide. I have the recent court orders pertaining to LTJG Williams for you sir.

Originally Posted by Armistead

Regarding further charges against LTJG Williams by Dr. Steve O.L.D, I hear by order LTJG Eugene Williams to be evaluated by Dr. Steve O.L.D. to determine if he is capable to stand trial regarding charges made by Dr. Steve O.L.D. If LTJG Eugene Williams has been found capable of combat
by Dr. Steve O.L.D, and also found competent to stand trial of the second offense by Dr. Steve O.L.D, I order him taken in custody and delivered to this court for trial. I then also order counsel on his behalf and appoint Dr. Steve O.L.D to represent him.

Admiral Armistead

Admiral Armistead is also requesting verification that LCJG Williams is still in custody of Subsim Psychiatric Hospital.

Good day sir.

[Sailor Steve]

Originally Posted by Father Goose

Excuse me, Dr. Steve. Blah, blah, blah...

Dr. Steve, as you can see the court has ordered:

How nice for you.

1) LCDR Williams relieved from his command on the USS Grenadier. DONE

Great. He doesn't need me to decide whether he gets his command back.

2) LCDR Williams be admitted to the Subsim Psychiatric Hospital and placed under your care. DONE

1) I'm not a navy psychiatrist.
2) I'm not a psychiatrist of any kind. I'm just a guy who answers silly questions. Sometimes.

3) LCDR Williams remains a member of low-standing of Subsim. DONE

Who says his standing is "low"? If I didn't hear it from Der Onkel then I didn't hear it at all.

The only issue remaining sir is, if and when you decide after evaluation, diagnosis, prognosis, treatments, injections, shock therapy, psychiatric sessions, and of course, after the patient pays his bill, if the patient is competent to return to combat duty. If that point is ever reached, the patient is ordered to report to Admiral Armistead for reassignment at the Admiral's discretion.

Oh. is THAT all? I'm not sure if he's competent to tie his shoelaces. On the other hand I feel the same way about YOU. Me, I use velcro.

Admiral Armistead is fully aware that everything this patient experienced on his last patrol and based on his behavior before and during trial, that your treatment may take weeks, months, even years! The Admiral is not pushing you for a decison. The Admiral is confident LCDR Williams is in good hands and will receive the treatment he deserves.

Maybe the Admiral needs a psychiatrist.

He, wait a minute! ARMISTEAD! Have you been moonlighting again, or is this 'Admiral' guy another one of your unsavory relatives? If the former, I'm going to have to put you back on peanuts. If the latter, one of you is a black sheep. Do I have to guess which one, or are you going to 'fess up?

Thank you sir.

No problem. Fifty bucks, please.

[Sailor Steve]

Originally Posted by Father Goose

It's a nice office Dr. Steve has here. Any chance he treats "multiple personality disorder"?

Yes, we do. Or rather he does. I don't. I think. Or maybe I don't do that either...

[Father Goose]

Dr. Steve, the Subsim Bureau of Investigation sent me over here on an urgent matter. Their Article 32 investigation of then LCDR Williams uncovered several "leads" that they are pursuing. It appears that then LCDR Williams may have only been "the tip of the iceberg". Of course, I cannot go into detail regarding those leads, only to say they have reason to believe that two suspects may be entering the Subsim Psychiatric Hospital with the sole purpose of unlawfully extracting LTJG Williams from your facility.

The two friends/sympathizers are:
1) LCDR Ray Green, USN, aka "les green01". The Bureau has named this individual a target of an investigation suspecting activity similar in nature to LCDR Williams charges. LCDR Green appeared at the Article 32 Hearing unannounced and made an absurd request that LCDR Williams "stay on the USS Grenadier". After the hearing, LCDR Green was observed buying LTJG Williams a drink, believed to be an A&W Rootbeer.

2) an individual known around Subsim as "Cybermat47". There's not much known about this character other than he made a preposterous statement on the record that he believed LCDR Williams was "not guilty". The Bureau also suspects he may be involved in a black market ring on base related to loading electronic equipment in vans after hours.

If either of these individuals enter the Subsim Psychiatric Hospital the Bureau instructs you to call the MPs. The Bureau advises apprehending LCDR Green, taking him into custody and await charges to be filed. The Bureau advises apprehending Cybermat47 and escorting him off the premises. They do not want him detained due to ongoing surveillance.

Good day sir.

[Sailor Steve]

Originally Posted by Father Goose

Dr. Steve...
Capt. Goose (I like the sound of that), Admiral Armistead's aide.

Any relation to the Lt. Goose who died in that unfortunate F-14 incident?

I have the recent court orders pertaining to LTJG Williams for you sir.

And I have evidence indicating that you are not competent to be trusted with delivering orders. I also have evidence that there is no order in de court.

Admiral Armistead is also requesting verification that LCJG Williams is still in custody of Subsim Psychiatric Hospital.

How would I know? I've never even heard of this SPH. Is it part of my HMO? Is it connected to SPECOPS?

Anyway, I had some guy raving that I should decide whether he should be returned to his boat. Was that him? I thought his name was Gilligan.

[Sailor Steve]

Originally Posted by Father Goose

Dr. Steve, the Subsim Bureau of Investigation sent me over here on an urgent matter.

SBI? Not another acronym!. I hate acronyms! Never use 'em myself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have an important appointment to keep.

Armistead! Have you seen my SCUBA gear?

...two suspects...

You look pretty suspect yourself.

may be entering the Subsim Psychiatric Hospital with the sole purpose of unlawfully extracting LTJG Williams from your facility.

Told ya, I never heard of it.

Psst, Armistead. Did you change the sign on the front door?

The two friends/sympathizers are...

Why, oh why, would you want me to spy? I'd rather die.

[quote]...the Bureau instructs you to call the MPs.
Oh, great, more acronyms! What do want me to call them? It's well known that I don't normally use that kind of language.

Good day sir.

Yeah, have a nice day yourself.

Hippie.

[Armistead]

Dr Steve,

While you were on vacation, I incorporated us as "SPH". to protect our assets and seek tax relief. You signed the forms, but you sign all forms.

I contacted myself as Admiral in my capacity as Office Manager and myself as Admiral does indeed trust Capt. Goose to deliver messages as needed.

Do you want me to file a report in my capacity as Office Manager to myself as Admiral against Capt. Goose regarding your trust issues?

[Father Goose]

Dr. Steve,

When you return from scuba diving, please answer the following questions that have been requested by the court.

Regarding the charges that were filed by Dr. Steve O.L.D {or his office} against LTJG Williams / Article 89—Disrespect toward a superior commissioned officer based on statements made to Dr. Steve by LTJG Williams.

1) Did you file charges against LTJG Williams or were said charges filed by a member of your office?

2) If you filed charges, do you plan to prosecute as well? If so, will you use spell checking?

3) Where is LTJG Williams being held?


As to the subject of LTJG Williams mental competency please address the following court order:

Originally Posted by Armistead

Regarding further charges against LTJG Williams by Dr. Steve O.L.D, I hear by order LTJG Eugene Williams to be evaluated by Dr. Steve O.L.D. to determine if he is capable to stand trial regarding charges made by Dr. Steve O.L.D. If LTJG Eugene Williams has been found capable of combat by Dr. Steve O.L.D, and also found competent to stand trial of the second offense by Dr. Steve O.L.D, I order him taken in custody and delivered to this court for trial. I then also order counsel on his behalf and appoint Dr. Steve O.L.D to represent him.

4) What is your finding pertaining to LTJG Williams mental competency relating to combat fitness?

5) Is LTJG Williams competent to stand trial for the second offense by Dr. Steve O.L.D?

Good day sir.

Capt. Goose, USN

[Wolferz]

Lock 'em all up!
This Marzipan incident is closed. [ Bangs gavel ]

[fireftr18]

Dear Steve,
Would you check on Armistead aka Admiral Armistead. I believe he has multiple personalities and has wrongly accused and charged LTJG Williams. I think it's Armistead that needs the help. Dealing with Wolferz all those years is probably what did it.

Either that or I drank too many Bilge Water Ales.

[Wolferz]

Either that or I drank too many Bilge Water Ales

Along with the shot of Torpedo juice dropped in the mug...
And then you went swimming.

Just for the record Doctor Steve, I've done nothing to Armistead that he hasn't already done to himself.