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09-24-18, 09:33 PM | #406 |
Swabbie
Join Date: Sep 2018
Posts: 7
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A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”
The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.” |
09-25-18, 04:46 AM | #407 |
Chief of the Boat
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There’s nothing more entertaining than going to watch a marathon live. My favorite part is the reaction of the runner’s face when I give him a cup of vodka.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-25-18, 11:37 AM | #408 |
Chief of the Boat
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Just signed a £250,000 per week contract to play for Manchester United.
I just need to get them to sign it now.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-25-18, 04:13 PM | #409 |
Fleet Admiral
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I lived in a tough neighborhood
I bought a waterbed and found a guy tied up at the bottom of it. It was a tough neighborhood
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
09-26-18, 05:06 AM | #410 |
Chief of the Boat
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Patient: Doctor please help me. I keep thinking I’m John McEnroe!
Doctor: You can’t be serious!!
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-26-18, 04:47 PM | #411 |
Fleet Admiral
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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.
It was a tough neighborhood
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
09-27-18, 06:12 AM | #412 |
Chief of the Boat
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Tesco Value Burgers – Low in fat high in Shergar.
What do you put on your burgers? A fiver each way.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-27-18, 08:40 AM | #413 |
Chief of the Boat
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I was cleaning out my late german grandfathers closet and decided to give all his old clothes to a charity shop. I handed over the bag of clothes to the assistant who was rummaging through it when a horrified expression formed on her face. How dare you bring this uniform in to my shop exclaimed angrily this is a symbol of pain shame and humiliation get out of my shop now hugely embarrased at this turn of events I quickly took back the bag. “I'm truly sorry“ I said I had no idea he was a SUNDERLAND FAN!!!
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-28-18, 05:08 AM | #414 |
Chief of the Boat
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Since his release on bail Oscar Pistorious has decided to spend the weekend clay pigeon shooting to relax. So far he’s accidentally killed 2 elephants and shot a Jeep that was on safari.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
09-28-18, 03:12 PM | #415 |
Fleet Admiral
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The first time I met my wife I suavely asked her what her sign was
"Dollar" I thought she was kidding.
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
09-29-18, 12:54 PM | #416 |
Chief of the Boat
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Apparently racist chanting was heard at the England training ground earlier today. The FA have threatened to remove John Terry from the squad if he does it again.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-08-18, 05:42 AM | #417 |
Sonar Guy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Sarasota Florida
Posts: 391
Downloads: 68
Uploads: 0
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Anyone Home?
Awfully quiet here.
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10-08-18, 06:50 AM | #418 |
Silent Hunter
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 3,657
Downloads: 58
Uploads: 0
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An Australian joke, not sure if this happens in other countries.
"What do you find on the roof of Macdonalds???" The answer.... pickles.
__________________
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10-08-18, 01:45 PM | #419 |
Sonar Guy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Sarasota Florida
Posts: 391
Downloads: 68
Uploads: 0
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10-08-18, 02:52 PM | #420 |
Fleet Admiral
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Being a Teenage Boy is tough.
One of the toughest parts is walking past the priests and they don't give you a second look any more
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
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