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Old 11-01-2011, 08:18 AM   #61
mookiemookie
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Playoffs??!!
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Old 11-01-2011, 09:14 AM   #62
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Good one Mark!
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Old 11-08-2011, 12:06 AM   #63
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Mookie - playoffs.

Let me help you understand the concept...

Its where you and the other guys that are really good at FF - slaughter us newbs who barely squeak in.

Like tonight - I barely squeaked out the win.
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Old 11-08-2011, 12:27 AM   #64
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NIGHTHAWKS SOAR
League Leaders Dragons Slayed



Week Nine in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and the Nighthawks come out and topple the league leaders in a convincing win. For the second week in a row, the Dragons suffered another loss and suddenly, the Surface Skimmers division is up for grabs.

We'll get to the biggest upset this year after we hear this important message.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FFL REPORTS FOR THIS YEARS "BEST OF SUBSIM".


They were 1-7 and having a Helmand Nightmare season, facing the league leading Dragons. But the Dragons were coming off an unexpected loss, and maybe the shock of Halloween the previous week didn't create the sugar high that was needed. The Nighthawks, desperate to turn their season around, did it a fabulous style, outgunning the Dragons through the first half of the week to earn their second win of the year. In a major upset with playoff implications, the Nighthawks get the better of the Dragons 115-87.

In the euphoric post game celebrations, Coach Chris, between beers, said "We circled this date at the beginning of the season. We came to play, and it was everything we thought it would be. We played it hard and in the end, we're just to come away with the win and look forward to next weeks game."

The Dragons loss creates a stampede of teams behind them and leading the pack is Every Given Sunday, the only winner in the division this week. On the strength of a five game winning streak, EGS accounted for the almost defunct Delaware Destroyers. The win by Every Given Sunday makes them the hottest team in the league, with supermodels, Orange county housewives, rap singers and playboy model Lindsay Lohan all wanting to get giggy with Coach Mike W.

The first thriller of the week was the matchup between the two biggest scoring teams in the league, the Guns of Hochuli at the Ghost Monkeys. The Monkeys, sitting mid league and desperate to get one game clear of the Wild Boston Terriers, started both of their running backs after the Gunners had finished with a sizable 121 points. The Monkeys needed the entire night of LeSean McCoy and Matt Forte to run down the Gunners... but it wasn't to be. The Gunners hold on for a narrow 121 -108 point win.

The second thriller and a lot more closer saw the haphazard .500% Black Cats trying to stop the 1-7 Reapers from getting their second win. The Cats finished early and had to wait out Jeremy Maclin on Monday night. Maclin was one pass and about 4 yards (did someone say screen?) from getting an upset win for the Reapers, who drop to the league worst 1-8 with the narrow loss, 95 - 93.40.

While everyone was scoring on Monday night, the one quarterback not achieving remarkable numbers was Michael Vick. Captaining the BP Badasses, Vick needed a paltry 13 points to get over the Australian Taipans. Recorded in another tabloid, Coach Pioneer arrived for the Sunday game locked out of Kansas City and unable to change his team, had to play out with backups. Despite scoring less than 7 points and not a single touchdown across his entire wide receiving score, the Taipans were able to run enough points to survive the scare, and advance to 8-1.

A surprising win in the middle of the league was the game between the Wild Boston Terriers and the Nutcrunchers. The Dogs, even with Aaron Rodgers, appear not to have enough elsewhere on the field to hold off the opposition. The trash talking Nutcrunchers, having stunned everyone with back to back wins in the previous weeks, make it 3 in a row and suddenly find them self only a game or two out of a potential championship play off spot, where as we know, anything can happen on the race to the Torpedo Bowl. (You got that Mookie?)

As we finish week nine and head into the first of the loooong weeks which start on Thursday night, the Dragons loss moves them to 7-2 and remarkably, even keeps the Reapers (mathematically) in with a chance of reaching the playoffs. The Reapers will have to do it the hard way, and must win against the league leading Taipans to stay alive.

The top of the league ladder is harder to work out, with six teams above .500% unclear where the final positions will rest. The Taipans only loss coming at the hands of the Dragons, who next week face the Nutcrunchers. The fastest moving team so far are Every Given Sunday who have posted six consecutive wins, but must now face the "meat" of the league against the Guns of Hochuli and the Dragons in back to back weeks. In the middle band of teams, the Wild Boston Terrier, although sitting below .500%, have three of their remaining five games against the bottom of the league.

The run into week 10 looks to be one of the best, this league has had in recent years.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 124 yards, 1 rushing touchdown, 5 receptions for 26 yards and 23.50 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Arian Foster of the Australian Taipans with the Week Nine MVT.


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Old 11-08-2011, 01:00 PM   #65
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I win another!
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Old 11-08-2011, 08:10 PM   #66
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I win another!
Ditto!
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Old 11-14-2011, 09:07 AM   #67
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My reaction to the past couple of weeks:

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Old 11-14-2011, 10:37 AM   #68
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My reaction to the past couple of weeks:


ditto. I watched 2 wins melt away (not including this week)
My team shows up when it doesn't matter.
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Old 11-15-2011, 12:15 AM   #69
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REAPERS SKIN TAIPANS
Surface Skimmers Division Wholesale Losses



Week Ten in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and for the second week in a row, the team at the bottom of the league has beaten the team at the top of the league. In addition, only one team in the Surface Skimmers Division scored a win. What is going on with these wholesale divisional losses?

We'll get to the second biggest upset this year after we hear this important message.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FFL REPORTS FOR THIS YEARS "BEST OF SUBSIM".

Last week were saw the team at the bottom of the ladder knock off the league leaders. What chance could we see it happen again this week with the 1-8 Reapers against the 8-1 Taipans. After the Taipans QB Phillip Rivers started somewhat poorly on Thursday night, the Reapers changed their starting line up before their first player took the field, and suddenly they were favorites to win the game. The game was tight all weekend, and, once again, the result was pending on the Taipans "come from behind on Monday Night" for the fourth straight week. Needing a swag of points from Percy Harvin, it wasn't to be. The Repears, for the third straight year, become the bogey team for the Taipans beating them 100.07 - 98.53.

Only Michael Jackson had more Thrillers than the Subsim League, and perhaps one of the best games of the year turned out to be a a defensive power struggle. The high scoring Ghost Monkey, after taking a verbal beating from Coach Mookie last week about "protect the lead", scored a paltry 69.57 points. The Black Cats, clearly the underdogs in this battle but with both teams at 5-4, turned it into an epic defensive game. The Cats with the Green Bay defense played back and forth into the fourth quarter, producing one of the best low scoring games of the year. Ghost Monkey hold on to win 69.57 - 66.85 and move to 6-4.

Over in the Sub Simmers division, Coach Rock and the Dragons, after suffering a shocking loss seven days ago, showed that his 7-2 didn't come from looking back, but from looking forward to the demolition of the next opponent. Unfortunately, it was the Nutcrunchers who had their nuts ....err, their winning streak crushed. The Dragons beat the Nutcrunchers 130 - 80. The win keeps the Dragons at the top of the Sub Simmers league, but don't look back, here comes Every Given Sunday.

With the hottest looking and most naked cheerleaders, Every Given Sunday has wiped out all before them after stumbling in the first three games of the year. Every Given Sunday, putting together this years best streak of 7 wins, have carved through the division to be sitting one game back of the Dragons. In so doing, EGS shut down the hard charging Guns of Hochuli by winning 135 - 73. The loss by the Gunners drop them to 7-3 and with the balance of the division behind them all losing this week, the Gunners maintain their two game lead and sit on the cusp of putting the remainder of the division out of the playoffs.

After the game, Coach Mike W, draped by near naked cheerleaders fondling him, managed to get his tongue out. "We circled this date at the beginning of the season. We came to play, and it was everything we thought it would be. We played it hard and in the end, we're just to come away with the win and look forward to next weeks game."

One game back the Wild Boston Terriers have declared their intent on a playoff appearance, smashing the the Delaware Destroyers 141 - 61. Coach Growler of the Destroyers is apparently trying to hock his team for an NBA franchise, while Coach McBee and the Doggies look forward to the rematch with Mookie and the Monkeys next week.

Down at the bottom of the table, teams are still battling for first round pick next year. Once a proud franchise, Mr. Chris and the London based Helmand Nighthawks keep their slim playoff chances alive with a 20 point win over the Badasses.

With four weeks before the playoffs, and the massive losses by the league leaders in the past two weeks, the situation looks like this.

No team has yet clinched a play off berth. The surprising win by the Reapers for only their second victory of the year still keeps them in the hunt with four teams - the Nighthawks, BP Badasses, Destroyers and Nutcrunchers, one game ahead at 3-7. A loss next week will probably doom any chance of a consolation series appearance.

The top of the league ladder is a mess. The Dragons and Taipans are both at 8-2 with the Dragons holding a half game win against the Taipans earlier in the season. The Dragons, who within their division are 5-1, sit one game clear of the Every Given Sunday, which will be our undisputed Week 11 Game of the Week. The Taipans look to slither into the playoffs matched against less than .500 teams.

But don't think those three teams have a monopoly on the Championship Series. The Ghost Monkeys at 6-4 battle divisional rivals the Wild Boston Terriers in the next biggest game of the week. The winners of this game and the Dragons/EGS game will clear the playoff picture in the Sub Simmers division, where potentially, five of the six teams will make the playoffs.

In the Surface Skimmers division, the Taipans and Guns of Hochulli have separated themselves from the rest of the division. Pending the outcome of other games, the Gunners and Taipans may be playing off for the division in the second last week of the regular season. The rest of the division will be picking up the scraps.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 8 receptions for 134 yards and 2 receiving touchdowns, for 30.65 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Rob Gronkowski of the Wild Boston Terriers with the Week Ten MVT.


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Old 11-15-2011, 03:38 AM   #70
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EGS - BOOM!!!
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Old 11-15-2011, 04:00 AM   #71
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fantasy football?
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Old 11-15-2011, 10:32 AM   #72
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fantasy football?
It's kinda like "Fantasy Island", but w/o Ricardo Montalban and the sand.
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Old 11-22-2011, 12:11 AM   #73
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De Plane, Boss! De Plane!
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Old 11-22-2011, 12:21 AM   #74
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ditto. I watched 3 wins melt away ( including this week)
My team shows up when it doesn't matter.


Fixed
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Old 11-22-2011, 01:23 AM   #75
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RODGERS COST TERRIERS
Last Pass Costs WBT Championship


Week Eleven in the 2011 Subsim Fantasy Football, and we'll answer all the big questions on your mind, like how much did that last pass cost the Wild Boston Terriers? Who's clinched a play off appearance and most importantly, how come Firefox crashed my Word document after writing this weeks column and before I could save it.

We'll get to those questions and more, after we step away for thirty seconds for this important announcement.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FFL REPORTS FOR THIS YEARS "BEST OF SUBSIM".

It was billed as the Game of the Week but it never quite lived up to it. Every Given Sunday, after having stormed through the last seven weeks amassing an unequaled streak finally had their charge put to an end this week by Coach Rick and the Dragons. In the highest scoring game of the week, the two teams combined for eleven touchdowns. The hard fought battle eventually saw the Dragons stamp their authority as the leagues #1 team as they accounted for EGS 128 - 92. The win pushes the Dragons to a two game lead over the balance of the division, but, they haven't won it yet.

Easily, the most controversial game of the year was the Wild Boston Terriers home game against the Ghost Monkeys. These two teams have jostled all year for the #2 position and this game proved to be one of the best. After having passed every game this year for over 300 yards, on the last play of the game, Coach McBee instructed his star QB, Aaron Rodgers to "throw it backwards". The pass recorded a negative yardage, and dropped Rodgers minus 6 points as it turned back to 299 yards. Would that pass haunt the Terriers who were looking to make the Championship Finals? It would come down to Monday with the Terriers Rob Gronkowski against the Ghost Monkeys Dwaye Bowe. The lead changed five times during the game before Bowe was finally able to hold one more pass and put the Monkeys in front at the bell. Final score Ghost Monkeys 83.38, Wild Boston Terriers 82.43

As the crown rushed onto the field to celebrate Coach Mookie said "We circled this date at the beginning of the season. We came to play, and it was everything we thought it would be. We played it hard and in the end, we're just to come away with the win and look forward to next weeks game." Coach McBee declined an interview but did kick the dumpsters over on his way out.

The biggest upset of the week was the surprising victory of the Black Cats against the Guns of Hochuli. The Kittens, needing to win every game until the end of the season, were pitted against the big scoring Gunners. The Gunners did the Cats a favor by recording a negative score on Thursday night and never really recovered. The Black Cats advance to 6-5 and get above .500% for the second time this season by defeating the Gunner 94-62.

The loss by the Gunners paved the way for the Australian Taipans to take a bite on the Surface Skimmers division. Although favored at the start of the game by 20 points (I have no idea how these predictions are justified) the Nutcrunchers were able to match the Taipans. Gradually the Taipans slithered away and amounted an unimpressive score, and a lead of 30 points. With Terrific Tom Brady at the helm, the Nutcrunchers failed to pass for for enough yardage and fall in the end. Taipans win 81 - 63 and take a two game lead over the rest of the division.

Coach Growler of the Delaware Destroyers finally showed up for the first game of the year to find his team still in with a playoff chance. His response to that news: offer up three players on a trade for the deadline that passed a day earlier. Still, it didn't hurt their performance as they got over the Helmand Nighthawks 95 - 92, to create a log jam at the bottom of the league for first pick of next years draft.

Making it a four way jam, the Reapers were easily able to account for the Bp Badasses 85 - 55, with both teams ending up at 3-8 records with the Reapers and Nighthawks.

So, with three weeks until the end of the regular season where does that leave us?

The Dragons and Taipans sit at the top of each division at 9-2. The Dragons, the #1 team in the league, hold a half game lead over the Taipans. Both teams have clinched a playoff spot. The Taipans, who have quietly ran out to 7-0 within the division, can clinch the division and a championship appearance with one win in the next three games. The Dragons have to wait out the battle behind them.

The Ghost Monkeys, Every Given Sunday and the Guns of Hochuli sit two games back. The Monkeys and EGS can still win the division on their own merits, but the Gunners need help to get in front of the Taipans. It's expected that two of these three teams will make the Championship Finals.

At 6-5, and the biggest surprise of the season, the Black Cats are perched on their own. One more game back at 5-6, the Wild Boston Terriers are ruing that costly Rodgers 1 yard pass, which potentially drops them out of a Championship appearance.

The Delaware Destroyers at 4-7 sit in the final play off position, but they are in no means secure. Four teams at 3-8 can still make the Consolation Series and eliminate them.

Next weeks biggest game is the Wild Boston Terriers hosting the Dragons. A win to the Dragons will secure them a Championship play off appearance while a loss will put the Terriers on the bubble of elimination. The Nutcrunchers and the Black Cats match is a key game not only to themselves, but to the other teams looking to grab that last play off spot. The Taipans can clinch the division with a win.

Dragon 9-2 (clinched play off position)
Taipans 9-2 (clinched play off position)
Ghost Monkeys 7-4
Every Given Sunday 7-4
Guns of Hochuli 7-4
Black Cats 6-5
Wild Boston Terriers 5-6
Delaware Destroyers 4-7 (on the bubble)
BP Badasses 3-8
Nutcrunchers 3-8
Helmand Nighthawks 3-8
Reapers 3-8

As for Firefox and Word...let's just say that just as much cursing went on as in the McBee household tonight.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 335 passing yards, 5 touchdown and not to be out-Tebowed, 2 rushing yards, for a total of 36.8 points, for 30.65 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Matthew Stafford of the Dragons with the Week Eleven MVT.



Last edited by Gut Wrench; 11-22-2011 at 08:31 AM. Reason: Minor correction, I blame FF and Word again.
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