The joke thread II - Page 279

Jimbuna · 03-24-23, 06:40 AM

I went to the doctors today to get my prostate checked. He gave me the thumbs up.

Jimbuna · 03-24-23, 06:47 AM

Yo mama is so fat when she went on a rowing machine it sank.

Jimbuna · 03-24-23, 01:02 PM

I never realized how common Tourettes syndrome was until I got a job as a traffic warden.

Platapus · 03-24-23, 03:59 PM

I like eating my cat and not using commas.

Jimbuna · 03-25-23, 07:41 AM

Did you hear about the wheat farmer who got arrested by the police? Apparently he was a CEREAL killer.

Jimbuna · 03-25-23, 07:47 AM

Yo mama is so ugly she was hired by a prison to cure sex offenders.

Tango589 · 03-25-23, 02:16 PM

What's the difference between erotic and kinky?

Erotic is using a feather, kinky is using the whole damned chicken!

Jimbuna · 03-26-23, 04:34 AM

My doctor told me today I need to watch my drinking. I now drink in front of a mirror.

Jimbuna · 03-26-23, 04:37 AM

Yo mama is so ugly when she went to the zoo people kept trying to feed her.

Platapus · 03-26-23, 06:49 AM

I decided to switch to using a solid deodorant recently.

The directions said take off cap and push up bottom

I am still walking a little funny, but the good news is that when I fart the room smells wonderful.

Catfish · 03-26-23, 01:15 PM

^ I stole that

Jimbuna · 03-26-23, 01:21 PM

Just been diagnosed with diabetes. I’m beginning to have doubts about Dr Pepper’s medical qualifications.

Jimbuna · 03-27-23, 04:54 AM

Yo mama is so stupid she made love to a carrot the other night because she was fed up of wearing glasses and wanted her eyesight to improve.

Jimbuna · 03-27-23, 04:55 AM

I never have any luck with women. The other day my girlfriend won a trip for 2 to Las Vegas, she went there twice on her own.

Platapus · 03-27-23, 03:51 PM

Pre means before
Post means after

To use both in a sentence would be preposterous

03-24-23, 06:40 AM	#4171
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	I went to the doctors today to get my prostate checked. He gave me the thumbs up. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-24-23, 06:47 AM	#4172
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Yo mama is so fat when she went on a rowing machine it sank. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-24-23, 01:02 PM	#4173
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	I never realized how common Tourettes syndrome was until I got a job as a traffic warden. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-24-23, 03:59 PM	#4174
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 18,939 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	I like eating my cat and not using commas. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

03-25-23, 07:41 AM	#4175
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Did you hear about the wheat farmer who got arrested by the police? Apparently he was a CEREAL killer. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-25-23, 07:47 AM	#4176
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Yo mama is so ugly she was hired by a prison to cure sex offenders. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-25-23, 02:16 PM	#4177
Tango589 Still crazy as ever! Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: A little south of sanity Posts: 3,358 Downloads: 180 Uploads: 1	What's the difference between erotic and kinky? Erotic is using a feather, kinky is using the whole damned chicken! __________________ Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way...

03-26-23, 04:34 AM	#4178
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	My doctor told me today I need to watch my drinking. I now drink in front of a mirror. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-26-23, 04:37 AM	#4179
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Yo mama is so ugly when she went to the zoo people kept trying to feed her. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-26-23, 06:49 AM	#4180
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 18,939 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	I decided to switch to using a solid deodorant recently. The directions said take off cap and push up bottom I am still walking a little funny, but the good news is that when I fart the room smells wonderful. __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

03-26-23, 01:15 PM	#4181
Catfish Dipped Squirrel Operative Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: ..where the ocean meets the sky Posts: 16,894 Downloads: 38 Uploads: 0	^ I stole that __________________ >^..^<*)))>{ All generalizations are wrong.

03-26-23, 01:21 PM	#4182
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Just been diagnosed with diabetes. I’m beginning to have doubts about Dr Pepper’s medical qualifications. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-27-23, 04:54 AM	#4183
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Yo mama is so stupid she made love to a carrot the other night because she was fed up of wearing glasses and wanted her eyesight to improve. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-27-23, 04:55 AM	#4184
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,102 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	I never have any luck with women. The other day my girlfriend won a trip for 2 to Las Vegas, she went there twice on her own. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

03-27-23, 03:51 PM	#4185
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 18,939 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	Pre means before Post means after To use both in a sentence would be preposterous __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.