Christmas Cracker Jokes - Page 4

Moonlight · 01-13-20, 05:23 PM

What did the elf say was the first step in using a Christmas computer?
First, YULE LOGon

Eisenwurst · 01-13-20, 05:46 PM

What do you get if you eat the Christmas decorations??

Tinnsilitis.

Eichhörnchen · 01-14-20, 01:49 AM

What do you call Father Christmas when he stops walking?

Santa Pause

Buddahaid · 01-14-20, 02:36 AM

This thread is actually funny if you speed read it.

Jimbuna · 01-14-20, 09:34 AM

Who is Santa's favorite singer?
Elf-is Presley!

Eichhörnchen · 01-14-20, 09:47 AM

How many lives did the cat have that Hitler got for Christmas?

Nein

Jimbuna · 01-14-20, 09:53 AM

What's Santa's favorite type of music?
Wrap!

Eisenwurst · 01-14-20, 04:02 PM

Did you hear about the kid who was scared of Santa?

He was Claustraphobic.

Moonlight · 01-14-20, 04:54 PM

What's another name for Santa's helpers?
Subordinate clauses

Eichhörnchen · 01-14-20, 05:26 PM

Where do the elves go for their Summer holidays?

Santa Parks

Eisenwurst · 01-15-20, 01:49 AM

What do snowmen like to do on weekends?

Just chill out.

Jimbuna · 01-15-20, 08:55 AM

Where do elves go to dance?
Christmas Balls!

Eichhörnchen · 01-15-20, 12:43 PM

How do you phone your list to Father Christmas?

Ring the Call Santer

Eichhörnchen · 01-15-20, 05:38 PM

How did Darth Vader guess what Obi-Wan had got for Christmas?

He felt his presents

Eisenwurst · 01-15-20, 06:43 PM

What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?

Arrested.

01-13-20, 05:23 PM	#46
Moonlight Admiral Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Fookhall Copse Posts: 2,125 Downloads: 184 Uploads: 0	What did the elf say was the first step in using a Christmas computer? First, YULE LOGon __________________

01-13-20, 05:46 PM	#47
Eisenwurst Silent Hunter Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 3,584 Downloads: 58 Uploads: 0	What do you get if you eat the Christmas decorations?? Tinnsilitis. __________________

01-14-20, 01:49 AM	#48
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 15,740 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	What do you call Father Christmas when he stops walking? Santa Pause __________________

01-14-20, 02:36 AM	#49
Buddahaid Shark above Space Chicken Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 8,551 Downloads: 160 Uploads: 0	This thread is actually funny if you speed read it. __________________ "However vast the darkness, we must provide our own light." Stanley Kubrick "Tomorrow belongs to those who can hear it coming." David Bowie

01-14-20, 09:34 AM	#50
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 180,968 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Who is Santa's favorite singer? Elf-is Presley! __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

01-14-20, 09:47 AM	#51
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 15,740 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	How many lives did the cat have that Hitler got for Christmas? Nein __________________

01-14-20, 09:53 AM	#52
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 180,968 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	What's Santa's favorite type of music? Wrap! __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

01-14-20, 04:02 PM	#53
Eisenwurst Silent Hunter Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 3,584 Downloads: 58 Uploads: 0	Did you hear about the kid who was scared of Santa? He was Claustraphobic. __________________

01-14-20, 04:54 PM	#54
Moonlight Admiral Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Fookhall Copse Posts: 2,125 Downloads: 184 Uploads: 0	What's another name for Santa's helpers? Subordinate clauses __________________

01-14-20, 05:26 PM	#55
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 15,740 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	Where do the elves go for their Summer holidays? Santa Parks __________________

01-15-20, 01:49 AM	#56
Eisenwurst Silent Hunter Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 3,584 Downloads: 58 Uploads: 0	What do snowmen like to do on weekends? Just chill out. __________________

01-15-20, 08:55 AM	#57
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 180,968 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Where do elves go to dance? Christmas Balls! __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

01-15-20, 12:43 PM	#58
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 15,740 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	How do you phone your list to Father Christmas? Ring the Call Santer __________________

01-15-20, 05:38 PM	#59
Eichhörnchen Starte das Auto Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: The Fens Posts: 15,740 Downloads: 5 Uploads: 0	How did Darth Vader guess what Obi-Wan had got for Christmas? He felt his presents __________________

01-15-20, 06:43 PM	#60
Eisenwurst Silent Hunter Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 3,584 Downloads: 58 Uploads: 0	What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck? Arrested. __________________