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10-18-20, 11:55 AM | #2401 |
Starte das Auto
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^ This should be in the Christmas Cracker Joke thread
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10-18-20, 12:06 PM | #2402 |
Chief of the Boat
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It's not that bad, shirley.
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
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10-18-20, 12:47 PM | #2403 |
Starte das Auto
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And don't call me Shirley
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Last edited by Eichhörnchen; 10-18-20 at 12:58 PM. |
10-18-20, 12:58 PM | #2404 |
Chief of the Boat
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Forgot to end with a question mark
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-19-20, 05:05 AM | #2405 |
Chief of the Boat
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A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable." Skeptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull.'"
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-19-20, 05:08 AM | #2406 |
Chief of the Boat
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There was a papa mole, a momma mole, and a baby mole. They lived in a hole out in the country near a farmhouse. Papa mole poked his head out of the hole and said, "Mmmm, I smell sausage!" Momma mole poked her head outside the hole and said, "Mmmm, I smell pancakes!" Baby mole tried to stick his head outside but couldn't because of the two bigger moles. Baby mole said, "The only thing I smell is molasses."
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-19-20, 03:48 PM | #2407 |
Fleet Admiral
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Every time I use Amazon Prime to watch my shows I can only watch episodes 1,3,5,7,11...
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abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
10-19-20, 03:49 PM | #2408 |
Fleet Admiral
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Why was the geometry teacher late for class?
She took the Rombus
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
10-19-20, 03:53 PM | #2409 |
Fleet Admiral
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I have found that when I post jokes on the Internet that they are not remotely funny.
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
10-20-20, 04:08 AM | #2410 |
Chief of the Boat
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Q: What do you call a pig that does karate?
A: A pork chop.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-20-20, 04:09 AM | #2411 |
Chief of the Boat
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Yo mama so fat the bears have to hide their food from her when she goes camping.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-20-20, 06:09 AM | #2412 |
Chief of the Boat
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Two bats are hanging upside down on a branch. One asks the other, "Do you recall your worst day last year?" The other responds, "Yes, the day I had diarrhoea!"
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-21-20, 06:24 AM | #2413 |
Chief of the Boat
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There are five cows on a farm, one mamma cow and four baby calves. The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, "Momma, why is my name Rose?" The mommy cow replies, "Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born." The next calf comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Lily?" The mother replies, "Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born." The third baby comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Daisy?" The momma cow again replieds" Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head." The final baby walks over and says, "Duh huh guh nuh!" The momma cow says, "Shut up, Cinderblock."
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-21-20, 06:25 AM | #2414 |
Chief of the Boat
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You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed. On your right side is a sharp drop off, and on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is another galloping horse but your horse is unable to overtake it. Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the horse in front of you. What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation? Get your drunk ass off the merry-go-round!
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
10-22-20, 06:57 AM | #2415 |
Chief of the Boat
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The energizer bunny was arrested on a charge of battery.
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
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