Duffleblog: 72 Black-Eyed Virgins Still Waiting To Give It Up

GT182 · 02-22-14, 04:37 PM

But little do these hori know that the 72 virgins promised these lads of premature detonation are all male. They're waiting for some moron that will never show up because he's now gay.

Wolferz · 02-23-14, 08:46 AM

Achmed was so surprised when he reached paradise and saw his virgins that he just went to pieces....again.

Ahh. Nubian. We got lots of that.

Sailor Steve · 02-23-14, 10:14 AM

As someone else pointed out long ago, they have it completely wrong. It's not 72 virgins, it's one 72-year-old virgin.

fireftr18 · 02-23-14, 10:20 AM

I saw a political cartoon once. The 72 virgins were all grumpy old nuns.

Sailor Steve · 02-23-14, 10:23 AM

And then there's the joke: Osama Bin Laden gets to paradise and is greeted by George Washington, who punches him in the face. Next is Thomas Jefferson, who does the same. The comes James Madison, Patrick Henry, James Monroe...

Osama finally gets to see Allah and demands an explanation. Allah says "Didn't you read the text? I said you'd be greeted by seventy-two Virginians..."

Jimbuna · 02-23-14, 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sailor Steve

And then there's the joke: Osama Bin Laden gets to paradise and is greeted by George Washington, who punches him in the face. Next is Thomas Jefferson, who does the same. The comes James Madison, Patrick Henry, James Monroe...

Osama finally gets to see Allah and demands an explanation. Allah says "Didn't you read the text? I said you'd be greeted by seventy-two Virginians..."

After getting nailed by a Daisy Cutter, Osama made his way to the pearly gates. There, he is greeted by George Washington. "How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" yells Mr. Washington, slapping Osama in the face.

Patrick Henry comes up from behind. "You wanted to end the Americans' liberty, so they gave you death!" Henry punches Osama on the nose.

James Madison comes up next, and says "This is why I allowed the Federal government to provide for the common defense!" He drops a large weight on Osama's knee.

Osama is subject to similar beatings from John Randolph of Roanoke, James Monroe, and 65 other people who have the same love for liberty and America.

As he writhes on the ground, Thomas Jefferson picks him up to hurl him back toward the gate where he is to be judged.

As Osama awaits his journey to his final very hot destination, he screams "This is not what I was promised!"

An angel replies "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you, idiot. What did you think I said?"

Aktungbby · 02-23-14, 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wolferz

Achmed was so surprised when he reached paradise and saw his virgins that he just went to pieces....again.

Ahh. Nubian. We got lots of that.

Wrong thread old pard'; should be "Goats you think are beautiful"!

02-22-14, 04:37 PM	#1
GT182 Ocean Warrior Join Date: May 2005 Location: New Castle of Delaware Posts: 3,231 Downloads: 658 Uploads: 0	But little do these hori know that the 72 virgins promised these lads of premature detonation are all male. They're waiting for some moron that will never show up because he's now gay. __________________ Gary No Borders, No Language, No Culture =s No Country I'm a Deplorable, and proud of it.

02-23-14, 08:46 AM	#2
Wolferz Navy Seal Join Date: May 2007 Location: On a mighty quest for the Stick of Truth Posts: 5,963 Downloads: 52 Uploads: 0	Achmed was so surprised when he reached paradise and saw his virgins that he just went to pieces....again. Ahh. Nubian. We got lots of that. __________________ Tomorrow never comes

02-23-14, 10:14 AM	#3
Sailor Steve Eternal Patrol Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: High in the mountains of Utah Posts: 50,369 Downloads: 745 Uploads: 249	As someone else pointed out long ago, they have it completely wrong. It's not 72 virgins, it's one 72-year-old virgin. __________________ “Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo

02-23-14, 10:20 AM	#4
fireftr18 Ocean Warrior Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Kentucky Posts: 2,528 Downloads: 77 Uploads: 0	I saw a political cartoon once. The 72 virgins were all grumpy old nuns. __________________ Of all the forms of Martial Arts, Karaoke causes the most pain!

02-23-14, 10:23 AM	#5
Sailor Steve Eternal Patrol Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: High in the mountains of Utah Posts: 50,369 Downloads: 745 Uploads: 249	And then there's the joke: Osama Bin Laden gets to paradise and is greeted by George Washington, who punches him in the face. Next is Thomas Jefferson, who does the same. The comes James Madison, Patrick Henry, James Monroe... Osama finally gets to see Allah and demands an explanation. Allah says "Didn't you read the text? I said you'd be greeted by seventy-two Virginians..." __________________ “Never do anything you can't take back.” —Rocky Russo Last edited by Sailor Steve; 02-23-14 at 12:19 PM.