Prepare your gag reflexes. - Page 2

Jimbuna · 05-15-09, 05:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by August

Oh C'mon, a guy could do a lot worse than Michelle Obama and i'll bet there are those on this board who did.

Those of you who aren't dating their right hand in the dark of their parents basement that is...

LMAO :rotfl:

A very loud, ugly, hard-faced woman walks into Tesco with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
The door greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Tesco. Nice children you've got there. Are they twins?"
The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to snarl, "Of course they bloody aren't, you *******ing idiot! The oldest, he's nine and the younger one, she's seven. Why the hell would you think they're twins...? Do you really think they look alike, you *******ing d**khead?"
"Absolutely not," replies the greeter. "I just can't believe anyone would shag you twice!"

August · 05-15-09, 02:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimbuna

LMAO :rotfl:

A very loud, ugly, hard-faced woman walks into Tesco with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
The door greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Tesco. Nice children you've got there. Are they twins?"
The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to snarl, "Of course they bloody aren't, you *******ing idiot! The oldest, he's nine and the younger one, she's seven. Why the hell would you think they're twins...? Do you really think they look alike, you *******ing d**khead?"
"Absolutely not," replies the greeter. "I just can't believe anyone would shag you twice!"

Aramike · 05-15-09, 04:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by August

Oh C'mon, a guy could do a lot worse than Michelle Obama and i'll bet there are those on this board who did.

Those of you who aren't dating their right hand in the dark of their parents basement that is...

I don't know about that ... I could play football on her forehead.

Frame57 · 05-15-09, 05:13 PM

I would do her....

Jimbuna · 05-16-09, 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frame57

I would do her....

I've met your kind before....shag the crack of dawn if it had hair on it

Jimbuna · 05-16-09, 06:01 AM

A large American woman was walking past a pet store when a parrot said, ''Hey, lady! You're *********g ugly!" The woman was furious and continued on her way.

On the way home, she passed by the pet store again and the parrot once more said, "Hey, lady! You're *********g ugly!" She was incredibly annoyed now, so she went into the store and said that she would sue them and have the bird put down. The store manager apologised profusely and promised he would make sure the parrot did not say it again.

The next day, she deliberately passed by the store to test the parrot. "Hey, lady!" it said.

"Yes?"

"You *********g know."

Frame57 · 05-16-09, 07:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimbuna

I've met your kind before....shag the crack of dawn if it had hair on it

I take great offense to that Buna. I like em bald too.....

Jimbuna · 05-17-09, 05:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frame57

I take great offense to that Buna. I like em bald too.....

LOL

sunvalleyslim · 05-18-09, 09:47 PM

The balder the better....................

Jimbuna · 05-19-09, 04:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sunvalleyslim

The balder the better....................

Hmm....right

05-15-09, 05:13 PM	#19
Frame57 Sea Lord Join Date: May 2008 Location: 1300 feet on the crapper Posts: 1,860 Downloads: 2 Uploads: 0	I would do her.... __________________ "My Religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble minds." Albert Einstein

05-16-09, 06:01 AM	#21
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 190,938 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	A large American woman was walking past a pet store when a parrot said, ''Hey, lady! You're *******g ugly!" The woman was furious and continued on her way. On the way home, she passed by the pet store again and the parrot once more said, "Hey, lady! You're *****g ugly!" She was incredibly annoyed now, so she went into the store and said that she would sue them and have the bird put down. The store manager apologised profusely and promised he would make sure the parrot did not say it again. The next day, she deliberately passed by the store to test the parrot. "Hey, lady!" it said. "Yes?" "You *****g know." __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!!**

05-18-09, 09:47 PM	#24
sunvalleyslim Ace of the Deep Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, Ca Posts: 1,142 Downloads: 267 Uploads: 0	The balder the better.................... __________________ Crew member/ decommission member TM2(SS)(SD) 3/68-7/70 DIESEL BOATS FOREVER USS SEGUNDO (SS398)