I just answered a call on our landline (we hardly ever use that phone) and what happened next was like something out of a Will Hay movie: an old lady with a thick Yorkshire accent told me that I hadn't left her any milk when she should have had two pints, and that I'd gone and left her brother "Two pints when he only has one", and that it was "Full-cream when it should've been skimmed"
I said I was sorry to hear all that but that I wasn't her milkman and this was a private number
She wanted the number so of course I gave it. "Is that all of it?" she asked
"Well there's the area code", I said... "That's 01205... why... where do you live, then?"
"Martin" she said
"Where's that?"
"Between Lincoln and Sleaford", she said
"Well why are you ringing me... I live near Boston"
"Because I haven't got any milk", she said
"Well I can't help you... you need to ring your milk company; who are they?"
"Capital Dairies", she said
I gave her the Directory Enquiries number and told her not to let them connect her or it would cost more... she must write it down and tell them she wants to ring it later
I hope she rings back because it's made my day
