tl;dr; Best one overall today: SH3 + mods. Maybe in one or two years, it will be Wolfpack / Uboat.
I own all of them. While Uboat and Wolfpack are still in early stages, I'm sure they will become much better than SH3, and will let him rest in peace at some moment.
The one I play the most nowadays is SH3 with several mods, then Wolfpack and then Uboat.
If you like crew management, then the best one is Uboat, next SH3 and last one Wolfpack.
If you want play a solo campaign during all the years of war, the best is SH3, then Uboat (It will be much better), then Wolfpack.
For multiplayer, the king is Wolfpack, then SH3. Uboat doesn't allow it.
For realism, at the moment the best is SH3, because the torpedo physics, planes, variety of ships, etc. In the second place Wolfpack - it lacks a lot of mechanics yet, but it have others that SH3 lacks. I'm sure Wolfpack will become the superior choice on realism.
For stability, I'd think there are a tripple tie here. Wolfpack is being developed and it has a lots of (minor) bugs. I do not play Uboat due to bugs. SH3 will crash some times, and will corrupt your savegames if you are using bad mod settings or saving in some circunstances.
For interface, the best one is Wolfpack. SH3 is too dated. Uboat is nice, but I hate some things, like the accidental mouse wheel usage, or the dragging scopes like they were a Firefox/Chrome window scroll.
For inmersion: I think SH3 is still the more inmersive, due to multiple tools and mods. However I think it will be surpased soon by Uboat, then Wolfpack.
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