[UKönig]

If I played as "dead is dead", then you might hear reports of something that sounded a little like this...

October, 1943

U-73 is the first of a few selected U-boats to receive new equipment in what feels like a very long time. The latest upgrade to the radar detector, or 'fuzz-buster' as my funkmaat likes to call it (I don't know why). Sonar detector, with range finding pulse, now we can ping them right back! BOLD decoy upgrades, supposed to last longer than the last batch. But the best improvement that I can think of is the snorkel system. The Dutch boats have had these in place for a while, but they were only used to air out their boats. Ours are also designed for us to start and use the diesel engines, while we are underwater!
I need not state the obvious advantages, except to say, that in this case, the irony was stronger, and the snorkel, or lack thereof, played no part in what followed...

U-73 in transit across the Bay of Biscay, from St. Nazaire. We are barely 4 hours from harbour when we are harassed by our first air attack. Shot one Short Sunderland down, damaged another. Attackers cease fire and withdraw.

30 minutes later, a fresh batch of 4 B-24 liberators. Nope, not these guys, "Alaaarrmm!!" - oh, uh, hang on a sec, we're still kinda close to shore. How deep is it really here? *ping* Ocean floor is 106m away... (whew). That had potential to be nasty.

Got to enjoy the symphony of charges going off, one after the other, round after round, for 5 minutes straight. They were pretty serious about stopping our patrol. Two hours later, surfaced into bright daylight, calm seas. I dispense with the watch crew, and just man the flak. I have two recently trained and qualified POs to handle the AA duties, and they're brothers! I couldn't ask for a more effective team. Maybe twin brothers, that might work... Anyway, we only had to wait another hour or so, and our radar detector started chirping away. The watch officer was close behind. "Aircraft spotted, incoming, at 150" "Fire at will!" Once the target had been identified, we remained confident in our ability to defend our boat. Our AA crew made short work of this flight of four Sunderlands, and with our morale at a dangerous high, we proceed, brazenly, on the surface.
We only had to wait about 30 more minutes when the next flight of four showed up. One thing about 1943 that I've noticed, is the frequency that aircraft attack. 1941, not so much, '42, a bit more, and then '43, bam! All over the sky...
Our gunners got it down to a fine science, and we had made quick work of 3, when the 4th came around for a bombing run. Port side aft. View from lower AA platform on type VIIb, about 240 degrees. Short Sunderland on approach, lower gunner leads target perfectly. Full magazine right into the cockpit. Pilots never saw it coming. Co-pilot shredded by sheer amount of shrapnel and bullets, lifeless body of pilot now falling over control column, causing the plane to assume a downward dive... Second by second the plane gets larger and larger through the targeting circle, when, it smashes bodily into the hull. The damage is instant and complete. The three crewmembers topside were killed instantly when the plane hit the hull, about the portside diesel room, breaching it seconds. The plane still carried its bombs so those got to go off at close range, further splitting U-73 in half. The crew in the bow compartments were flooded almost immediately, and within 5 minutes, U-73 took all hands to the bottom. There were no survivors...

Is what it would sound like if 'dead is dead'. But since I will only start again with the same name and pretty much the same career, I might as well just start over from before when I made that terrible mistake, and save some time.