I'm the OP.
I did a little testing. I didn't yet find a way to get a stratotanker unstuck but, it looks like the thing to do is not to get it stuck in the first place.
Before you tell a plane to refuel at the stratotanker, make sure that the tanker has no waypoint to go to and is loitering. You may have to check its speed to set it to loiter.
When you tell a plane to refuel, do not interrupt it on the way to the tanker or stop the refueling early. Make sure the plane has completed refueling. The planes flight time should be counting down and, the stratotanker should be loitering in a circle constantly changing direction.
If you tell a plane or group to refuel and then accidentally interrupt its course to the tanker, tell it to refuel again or the tanker will become stuck.
I have tried telling a plane to refuel then hit the unassign key for the plane. The tanker will still become stuck in place. You must again tell the plane to refuel and let it complete the refueling. That should allow the tanker to move again.
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