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If you have a wireless connection and want to host, you probably need to fiddle with more than the standard port settings.
Since you've managed to remain connected during a "random" scenario, you've accomplished more than most players. Possibly, the disconnects are caused by the "randomizer" selecting a ship or scenario not found in some players' game files. Which is why I'd like to know which version (download, DVD expansion pack, or Gold edition) you're using. And if you've installed any mods.
Also, this is a shot in the dark: have you played the U-Boat campaign yet? (I'm wondering if doing so creates either a new file or an entry in an existing file that might be used in a random MP scenario.)
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