Now let's not make TMO into the unbeatable enemy. It is not. It also does not forgive errors and will sometimes kill you when you do the right thing. A couple of observations.
Just because an escort is pinging does not mean that he knows where your are. If you're deep below a thermal layer, or for some reason, at periscope depth on silent running and presenting a low aspect ratio (pointed at him) there is a good chance he doesn't have a clue. Resist the urge :rotfl

sorry, couldn't resist) to make violent action. This is where the first one to flinch loses. Watch him carefully. Listen. Is he moving slow with constant speed? Is he turning the pinging on and off? He's hoping to lure you into making a higher speed run for "safety." Don't take the bait. Only evade if you know he detects you. This is the hardest thing to learn.
When you have multiple escorts looking for you one is always listening while the others ping. I like to stay at periscope depth at silent running while I evaluate the intelligence of the boats. Do we have high rated or low rated adversaries. Usually you have both. What are they doing? Poke up that scope, pre-aimed to the bearing of an escort and look for 10 to 15 seconds and lower it. You're looking for one boat to pull out slightly and stop to listen. Then it's time for some payback. Set torpedo for as shallow as you can and at the bearing of the parked victim. AoB and speed zero. Fire and don't lollygag with your scope up. Lower it, wait for the boom. You'll get it. At that point the others get skittish and it's a good chance to slink away. Go ahead, poke down below that thermal barrier and creep away at 3 knots.
Yeah, you just ran away from a fight. Feel like a heel, don't you? As soon as you get out of sight of the escorts still looking for you surface, hit the jets ahead emergency and do an end around the convoy to the other side. If all goes well, this is a money shot at the merchies while the escorts continue to look for you on the other side. Two shots into the biggest merchie, 1/4 of the way back from the bow and then 1/4 of the way forward from the stern. He's going down. Look for an opportunity to take out another merchie but also know that the escorts are now charging your way with murder on their minds.
Time to mix it up a little. Hopefully one is way ahead of the others. Set as shallow as possible, magnetic pistol and try to get off a stern shot from periscope depth going ahead emergency with him behind you. Be patient, set up the bearing, switch to the attack screen with periscope up and don't shoot until he's 400 yards back. Your speed will lessen his relative approach speed. Your torpedo's route to him, however, will be breathtakingly fast. Let her rip and immediately crash dive and turn right or left. If you miss he's dropping right on top of you. Don't be there. When you hit 100' go to silent running and continue your dive below the thermal barrier. Hope you heard a boom! As you've already said, in TMO there are no guarantees.
I'll wait for others to chime in. But you can see I don't do fancy multi-ship targeting. I keep it simple and don't get greedy. Self-control is one of the secrets to success.