Quote:
Originally Posted by August
"John has a long mustache" 
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"wounds my heart with a monotonous languor"
Did you try Google? A dictionary? I'm honored that you came here first, but nobody knows everything. That said, August's version sounds correct to me.
"When the chips are down, you need all the friends you can get." That's one of many uses of the phrase. Usually in connotates being in a very bad position, and judges the subject by how he reacts in that situation.
It sounds to me like someone took the phrase and added something related but irrelevant just for the humor. It's an old fun game, taking the first half of a famous phrase and adding an unexpected second half just for a laugh.
I was just telling a friend about an old comedy country song called 'Cow Patty', about a girl who seeks revenge for her father's murder. When she finds the killer, he's faster on the draw than she is, but steps in a cow pie at the critical moment, so she gets him. Since cow patties/pies are also called cow chips, the whole song is a setup for the moral of the story: "When the chips are down...watch your step."
The timing on this was perfect.