I'm not going to lie, I miss a lot.

And they'll never find the bourbon I hide on my Norwhal!!1
I mean't 75% of the ship's length... the cone of my spread.
Surface Action? That wasn't me or you're misreading... I *never* fire my deck guns at anything not made of WOOD! And even then I've very very nervous.
I was joking about hyper-pinging a subchaser... and I know a DD can hear even 1 ping. But since I'm often detected without a ping and often NOT-detected with ping, I lack this "fear of pinging a DD" altogether.
I feel so naked with my scope up.

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Yup the 75% of the ship's length makes sense. I'd recommend that you never spread behind the TDC solution, only ahead. And wood makes the preferrable target to be sure.
Where you really hit the nail on the head is in deciding when stealthy is not healthy. If they already know where you are, ping away. If they already have detected you forget about ahead 1/3 and make some tracks. Reload torpedoes. Get that damage control party working. Make some distance, then secure all, go to silent running, change depths and heading and try to hide. One sonar range is worth three stadimeter ranges. I have a healthy hatred of the stadimeter. I'm good at it but I'll never trust it before a sonar range or a Dick O'Kane attack. Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn't the sharpest knife in the pack. Always pick the sharpest knife in a fight. Always think, "Is this a good time to attack?" If they're all over you, it probably is.