Mush, you are right on the button there, that IS how it works. We have a gender change here 'cos I, the wife, am the gamer and hubs is not, and I think we DO need to be sensitive to our partners because this is essentially a one-person pursuit, and the other one can feel shut out and shoved to the back.
I use headphones when himself is sitting next to me at his computer, but I am careful to instantly remove them if he says anything.
