If you are on a bus or train, you can write your name in the condensation on the window
If you are a graffiti artist, you can write 'I wish my girlfriend was this dirty' in the dirt on the back of a truck
If you are a Buddhist you can make the sound of one finger clapping
If you are a pianist, you can play Chopsticks, or at least half of it anyway
If you are the leader of a major world power, you can fire a nuclear ballistic missile

Chock