It's mid '45. An elderly Italian man asked the local priest to hear his confession.
--Father, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Enemy. I hid her in my attic.
--That was a wonderful thing you did, my son, and you have no need to confess.
--Its worse, Father. she started to repay me with sexual favors.
--You were both in great danger, two people together under those circumstances act that way. You are forgiven.
--Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. But I have one more question.
--And what is that?
--Should I have told her the war was over?
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Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line he comes across a man who isn't saluting.
"Why aren't you saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.
"Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," comes the answer. "I'm not crazy!"
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Hitler and Göring are standing on top of Berlin's radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to cheer up the people of Berlin. "Why don't you jump?" suggests Göring.
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"Two Jews are about to be shot. Suddenly the order comes to hang them instead. One says to the other "You see, they're running out of bullets."
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"What will you do after the war?"
"I'll finally go on a holiday and will take a trip round Greater Germany!"
"And what will you do in the afternoon?"
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--Greetings, Hitler, I am Quisling.
--Ach so. Und what's your name?