Wife: Honey, I want to go to bed.
You: All off-duty personell, man your battle stations.
Wife: I worked all day, cleaning the house, cooking and all that s**t, and I want to go to bed.
You: All hands, we are now running silent, repeat, full silent.
Wife: If you dont come with me on the bed, I will file a divorce.
You: Conn, active sonar on our 6.
Wife [pissed off big time]: That's it, it's over!
You: Conn, torpedo room, we are taking on water!
Wife: Damn you!
You: All hands, this is your captain. Abandon ship...
