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Gut Wrench · 01-01-24, 08:51 PM

AUSTRALIAN TAIPANS WIN CLOSE CHAMPIONSHIP
Best Final in Years.

Week seventeen in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and if you're looking for a Monday night game, you as big a dumbass as me. I'm sitting here with the draft of this weeks column for 24 hours not realizing the games are over, and we have a champion.

We'll go around the grounds one final time this year, right after this message.

DONATE TO SUBSIM...AND NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

We'll start at the bottom and work our way up.

In the race for the 7th place, the sophomore team of the Banter Brigade were hosting the Drunk Monkeys in England. The Banter finished out the regular season as the 5th place team, on a count back. They lost the first game of the playoffs and welcomed the Drunk Monkeys to town. The Monkeys, the epitome of "so close, so far" in the league, came to play. After getting rolled the previous week, they were having none of it this week as Lamar Jackson (QB) and Ceedee Lamb (WR) combined for over a 100 points on their own. The Banter playing a man down with no QB, put up a valiant effort with Najee Harris (RB) scoring 30 points, but it was always going to be the Monkeys on this one. In perhaps the most outstanding performance of the playoffs, and the regular season, the Drunk Monkeys exceed all expectations, and thump the Banter Brigade 175 - 122.

In the closest scoring game of the final weekend, the Who Dat Nation Rises welcomed the Black Cats to town. Two prior Torpedo Bowl Champions battled it out in a slug fest in Oregon with a combined three players not suiting up for the game - all from Florida State University (too soon?) Amon St Brown (WR) was the best performer of the Black Cats but it was Kyle Pitts (TE) lowly 1.5 points which gave the victory to the Nation. With the Eugene Weekly newspaper having gone bankrupt this week from employee extortion, there is no one other than us to tell you that the final score was Who Dat Nation Rises defeated the Black Cats 88 - 81.

Back in England again, the Boss team were hosting the Guns of Hochuli. Both teams were unlucky in the prior week and were playing off for the bronze medal. The Gunners came to town, the only one of these two teams having won a championship previously, and they showed why. Again, even with both teams playing men (multiples) down, Travis Entinee (RB) of the Bosses still put up 31 points, almost half of the entire team. The Gunners methodically fired away across the full range and were able to whittle the lead, even with Christian McCafferery (RB) only scoring 13 points. The Guns of Hochuli arrive wounded by winning the bronze medal with a score of 82 - 72 over the Boss team.

And now the championship game.

Two teams that had very different paths into the championship game. The Taipans, who carried no less than five (5) running backs all year, lead the league from week two and it wasn't until the first week of the playoffs that they truly struggled. Having made their way of the first round they lost three (3) stars to injury and had to go to the waiver wire. Contrast this to the Nighthawks who had a dismal start to the season, and didn't get their first win until week four. From the bottom of the ladder they stormed their way through the league, secured the division and the #2 seed and were marching on to victory. The Nighthawks started the week as favorites in a back and forth game, the lead changing alone four (4) in Thursday night. This was a wild shootout folks, Brandon Aiyuk (WR) scoring 30 points for the Nighthawks, Kyree Williams (RB) matching him for the Taipans. Both teams exceeded their forecast points, but there would always be one, one player who would come through and provide the difference in this game. This game was so close it ran into Sunday night where the Nighthawks could still win, but the damage had been done by DJ Moore (WR) for the Taipans. In the best championship game of the last few years, the Australian Taipans secure the Torpedo Bowl championship with a 171 - 147 win over the Helmand Nighthawks.

Congratulations to all the teams, the coaches, and to the players who frustrated the hell out of us for the past seventeen weeks.

Tomorrow morning, we'll announce our All Star team, with special tribute in their name.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

It would have been easy to take one of the players form the Championship game, but is was down in the trenches that the true gutsy effort was made. For the effort of 321 yards and 5 touchdowns, and 32 rushing yards,, for a score of 51.84 points, the Week Seventeen MVT goes to Lamar Jackson (QB) of the Drunk Monkeys.

01-01-24, 08:51 PM	#19
Gut Wrench Chief Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Everywhere Posts: 321 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	AUSTRALIAN TAIPANS WIN CLOSE CHAMPIONSHIP Best Final in Years. Week seventeen in the Subsim Fantasy Football League, and if you're looking for a Monday night game, you as big a dumbass as me. I'm sitting here with the draft of this weeks column for 24 hours not realizing the games are over, and we have a champion. We'll go around the grounds one final time this year, right after this message. DONATE TO SUBSIM...AND NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM. We'll start at the bottom and work our way up. In the race for the 7th place, the sophomore team of the Banter Brigade were hosting the Drunk Monkeys in England. The Banter finished out the regular season as the 5th place team, on a count back. They lost the first game of the playoffs and welcomed the Drunk Monkeys to town. The Monkeys, the epitome of "so close, so far" in the league, came to play. After getting rolled the previous week, they were having none of it this week as Lamar Jackson (QB) and Ceedee Lamb (WR) combined for over a 100 points on their own. The Banter playing a man down with no QB, put up a valiant effort with Najee Harris (RB) scoring 30 points, but it was always going to be the Monkeys on this one. In perhaps the most outstanding performance of the playoffs, and the regular season, the Drunk Monkeys exceed all expectations, and thump the Banter Brigade 175 - 122. In the closest scoring game of the final weekend, the Who Dat Nation Rises welcomed the Black Cats to town. Two prior Torpedo Bowl Champions battled it out in a slug fest in Oregon with a combined three players not suiting up for the game - all from Florida State University (too soon?) Amon St Brown (WR) was the best performer of the Black Cats but it was Kyle Pitts (TE) lowly 1.5 points which gave the victory to the Nation. With the Eugene Weekly newspaper having gone bankrupt this week from employee extortion, there is no one other than us to tell you that the final score was Who Dat Nation Rises defeated the Black Cats 88 - 81. Back in England again, the Boss team were hosting the Guns of Hochuli. Both teams were unlucky in the prior week and were playing off for the bronze medal. The Gunners came to town, the only one of these two teams having won a championship previously, and they showed why. Again, even with both teams playing men (multiples) down, Travis Entinee (RB) of the Bosses still put up 31 points, almost half of the entire team. The Gunners methodically fired away across the full range and were able to whittle the lead, even with Christian McCafferery (RB) only scoring 13 points. The Guns of Hochuli arrive wounded by winning the bronze medal with a score of 82 - 72 over the Boss team. And now the championship game. Two teams that had very different paths into the championship game. The Taipans, who carried no less than five (5) running backs all year, lead the league from week two and it wasn't until the first week of the playoffs that they truly struggled. Having made their way of the first round they lost three (3) stars to injury and had to go to the waiver wire. Contrast this to the Nighthawks who had a dismal start to the season, and didn't get their first win until week four. From the bottom of the ladder they stormed their way through the league, secured the division and the #2 seed and were marching on to victory. The Nighthawks started the week as favorites in a back and forth game, the lead changing alone four (4) in Thursday night. This was a wild shootout folks, Brandon Aiyuk (WR) scoring 30 points for the Nighthawks, Kyree Williams (RB) matching him for the Taipans. Both teams exceeded their forecast points, but there would always be one, one player who would come through and provide the difference in this game. This game was so close it ran into Sunday night where the Nighthawks could still win, but the damage had been done by DJ Moore (WR) for the Taipans. In the best championship game of the last few years, the Australian Taipans secure the Torpedo Bowl championship with a 171 - 147 win over the Helmand Nighthawks. Congratulations to all the teams, the coaches, and to the players who frustrated the hell out of us for the past seventeen weeks. Tomorrow morning, we'll announce our All Star team, with special tribute in their name. Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance. It would have been easy to take one of the players form the Championship game, but is was down in the trenches that the true gutsy effort was made. For the effort of 321 yards and 5 touchdowns, and 32 rushing yards,, for a score of 51.84 points, the Week Seventeen MVT goes to Lamar Jackson (QB) of the Drunk Monkeys.