I think toward your night attacks you need to have auto targeting on to get range etc of target then switch to manual once you have all the details you need
The latest versions of the mods were about right although NYGM 2.0 should be released very soon
GW adds more realism without making it impossible to sink stuff
Aircraft are not so easy to blow out of the sky and ships are not floating targets compared to the stock game
What I suggest you do is add a couple of SH3 installs to your comp and install a different mod to each then play away
If you dont like just delete that install - I personally found that the best way and had 5 different SH3s on the go to start with

till I found what I liked
Each mod is a matter of taste and everyone will tell you their choice is the best but no substitute for finding out yourself