Hidden inside the game engine is the infamous Blind Chimpanzee. He is installed on a swivel stool, surrounded by a cylindrical dart board with semi-amazing upgrades stuck on it in random places. In his hands he holds darts.
When you enter port after a cruise, the chimp is equipped with a number of darts, corresponding to the quality of your cruise: better performance, more darts. Worse performance, fewer darts. Upon your entry of the port, Admiral Lockwood gives our chimp a hefty spin. Once spun the blind chimpanzee tosses his darts to the inside of the cylindrical dart board.
If one of the darts sticks into the paper target entitled "Conning tower update" then you get one. If none does, then you wait. There are no guarantees as you are at all times under the power of the Blind Chimpanzee. It is entirely possible to never have a bad cruise and you never get an upgrade. It is entirely possible that after a bad cruise you get the upgrade.
Because, you see, the place is under the control of a blind chimpanzee. You think it's Admiral Lockwood, but his only job is to spin the stool. It really sucks to find out now the Navy really works, doesn't it?
