[Aktungbby]

Originally Posted by Aktungbby

As chief of the boat, I protest; your farts are held 'in reserve' for blowing ballast ONLY.

Originally Posted by Armistead

... Preacher looked at me and said " do you seek salvation?" and I replied with a firm "yes i do" hoping to get some fresh air as several said "amen".

Preacher thought healed and praised the Lord. A few of my youth friends caught on and to escape, they came to the alter too. Preacher said the spirit was moving, but we knew it was much more than the spirit.
With all the fuss on our side the aisle, those on the other side weren't to be outdone. We had one old fat black lady in the church, one was allowed. She was like a spiritual lady, people listened to her. When the fart hit her, she hollered out "da angels done broke the 7th seal, judgement day is here!" so that really got people stirred up.

The Lord does work in mysterious ways!

Well there it all is on second reading: I've had an Epiphany! As long as the boat's Padre, Tango, is at hand to elicit salvation and redeem the Bilge, Armistead may bestow his 'blessing' at will.The anus cannot be heinous if it's in the service of the Lord! No wonder they're called 'Pews'!