NOT FUNNY?
There's obviously a circus coming to our town 'cos I keep seeing their vans with a big clown's face all over them. Well I never found circus clowns funny, not even as a kid. Continually falling on your backside and chucking buckets of confetti over the audience just doesn't do it for me.
My wife and I sometimes imagine TV sketches we'd
like to see, but which haven't been done yet, and my ideal clown sketch might show:
Clown standing between two large crates about twenty feet apart. Dwarf pops out from one, runs up behind clown and kicks him in the jacksy. There follows the usual gormless hopping about, rubbing of sore backside: so far so ordinary. Clown turns round but of course the dwarf is back in his box by now. Dozy clown scratches his stupid head. Kids in crowd go mental.
Out from the other crate pops another dwarf; runs up, kicks clown in the jacksy. Clown, rubbing backside, faces audience who are yelling "He's behind you..." Clown turns round: no-one there.
Meanwhile, dwarf 1 pops out of his box again, runs up, kick clown up the bum, clown with wretched imploring face still not able to turn round in time to catch sight of the dwarf who's vanished back into his crate.
Dwarf 2 pops out again, this time kids in audience screaming and pointing "There! There!" Clown turns round as dwarf is beginning his run-up; Clown with big vacant smile on face just before dwarf arrives in target zone and kicks him FULL IN THE CROTCH.
Now I'd pay to see
that...