AND BEHOLD, THERE WAS ONE.
Gunners sole team at 4-0
Week 4 in the Subsim Fantasy League. We're going to tell you about the sole team that stands alone undefeated. We'll tell you about one of the teams that earned their first ever win in one of the biggest upsets of the years. And we'll tell you about two teams that had no business being on the field this weekend, and still one of them got a win.
But before we tell you anything else, the first thing we have to do is tell you about the most important thing you need to do today.
NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.
And the second thing we have to do is apologize for running the same headline last week. Phew. You would think with the money that Neal is paying for this column I could come up with something original and didn't sound like the week before.
Let the fantasy world get turned upside down with one of the biggest beat downs that we've seen in such a long time...no one can pinpoint when it last happened. The Who Dat Nation, hot favorite in Las Vegas to win the entire Championship, stumbled from a perfect season, when they came up against the 0-3 Mini Dead Poets. The Miniatures must have caused the circled this day because they arrived in Oregon with a bang. It's not that the Nation didn't play well, it was more a case that that the Miniatures stunned the fantasy by playing beyond their ability. Jordy Nelson (WR) scored closed to a career high, Reggie Wayne (WR) scored in double figures, and not even the abysmal failure of their quarterback, Tom Brady, could hold the Miniatures back this week. The Mini Dead Poets hand the Who Dat Nation their first loss of the year, and suddenly, the Poets find themselves right back in the chase of the championship at 1-3. Mini Dead Poets steal one away from the Who Dat Nation 124 - 114.
The other big scoring game of the week comes on the back of some commentary by Coach McBee. Earlier in the week, McBee was overheard trying to sell off his team for a 1957 VW bug. Rumor mongering suggest that the team thought they were at least worth a 1974 Golf and set out to create a storm that has made the fantasy world open their eyes. In the past few weeks, the Subsim Torpedo Bowl has been graced by some extremely high scores, and not to be outdone, the Wild Boston Terriers set about establishing a significantly high score. After crossing the Atlantic, Mister Chris and the Helmand Nighthawks had a chase, but when it came down to Monday night, Jamal Charles (RB) just could not carry the team on his own. Wild Boston Terrier choke the Helmand Nighthawks 159 - 100.
But that was not the biggest blow out of the week. Last week we talked about the Black Cats and their rag tag purring through the league. This week, Coach F.Y.C. spurned his team to a new level of performance, against the struggling Green Beans. The Beans in the past few years have been thE "coming and going" team, and this week, they really went away. Starting no less than three players either on vacation or in hospital, the Green Beans barely managed to score their 30 points. The Black Cats took the opportunity to race through and add some for and against leverage by managing a consistent productive team. Black Cats earn the biggest blow out by pillaging a team that probably would have scored more if they had stayed at home. Cats win 117 - 36.
After the game F.Y.C. addressed the media before leaving the stadium.
"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."
Our match of the week was the top of the ladder clash between the Bilge Rats and the Guns of Hochuli. The Rats probably could have won this if they had bothered to start a RB and a TE that weren't on vacation, however, they did and that gave Coach Chad just enough room to garner the win. The win gives the Gunners sole possession of the league, and a half game lead over the Black Cats as the Gunners are already 2-0 within the division. If the Bilge Rats want to be considered a formidable force within the league, they are going to have step up the business. Gunners win 97 - 66.
In the bracket of having no business winning, what on earth did the Taipans do this week. After Thursday night the Taipans had used three players to amass the "huge" score of 16 points. The Taipans were staring down the throat of a third consecutive loss against Coach Michael, who set a new franchise record by starting 5 players on vacation or permanently disabled. Even with those players out, Michael's Team put up enough points to have our printing presses getting ready to run the biggest disaster story ever reported in the league. If the Taipans can't get a win when the opposition stay at home, maybe they need to be relegated to the NFL. Taipans get a win that they had no business receiving by defeating Michael 89-45.
So with a third of the season is complete, let's see where the teams lay.
The Guns of Hochuli own the league at this time with a 4-0 record. At 3-1, Sub Simmers divisional rivals the Bilge Rats and the Who Dat Nation are tied with the Black Cats. The Wild Boston Terriers, Helmand Nighthawks and the Australian Taipans are all tied at .500. Behind them the Mini Dead Poets get off the bottom of the ladder to advance to 1-3, while Michael's Team and the Green Beans fight out for first pick of the draft next year.
Next week we go back to the Black Cats lair as they go up against the Bilge Rats in our feature match. This game has the most intrigue as it plays out for a potential count back at the end of the season where these 3-1 teams are expected to meet. And we'll be there from the first kick on Thursday night to the last kneel down on Monday.
Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.
For the effort of 10 receptions for 108 yards and 2 touchdowns, for a total of 32.40 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Jordy Nelson of the Mini Dead Poets, the Week Four MVT.
