As nobody rushes to answer, ill try to do it, based on my past experience with SH5.
Short answer:
There's not so many of them, try each for a few days and see which suits you best, because realism is in the eye of the beholder, as they say.
Long answer:
Before speaking of different mod lists, you should know that each and every of them are built using pretty much the same basic "bricks", just arranged somewhat differently, to the taste of the person who "incorporated" them: Open Horizons 2 (latest version), IRAI (latest version), TDW's hardcoded patches, FX update, radio comms, damage, sub crew and interior. So the main aspects of the game are common to all modsoups.
The areas where they differ are mainly the UI, weather&environment and the personal tweaks made by the person who put the supermods together.
But the main gameplay will be basically the same, as IRAI is still IRAI and OHII remains OHII. The planes will still be overdone and unrealistically dangerous early in the war, the convoys, when attacked, will still behave unrealistically, with ships stopping dead in the water or scattering in all directions, turning into a mess of ships that crash into each other, the sub will still be affected by the dreaded "sub on rails" bug present since SH4 etc...
IMO you will not find the realism experience present in GWX. Thats just my personal opinion and I would rejoice being contradicted in my criticism by anyone who will prove me its unfounded.
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