Observe, dear students, closely this perfect case in point of what we have discussed in the theory classes for the last two weeks. This here is, as you may remember from the exam material, a perfect case in point of "last word syndrome". Does anyone remember what the symptoms are?
Yes, that's correct: the obsession of always replying, no matter if it makes sense or not, and not really saying anything but still clinging to the vain Internet pride and the compulsive need to always make the last reply of the argument so that your argument (which most likely ceased being relevant to the discussion at least several pages ago to everyone but yourself) will seem like the ultimate truth. Can someone tell us what causes it?
Yes, that is again correct: we need two people for such phenomena to happen, well said indeed. We need two, for obviously there can't be the last reply obsession if you don't have anyone to reply to. Also, we specifically need two persons suffering from the syndrome, as otherwise the other person will choose the only sensible course of action (that is, cease replying and wasting time) and thus spoils the obsessed person's fun.
Yes, a question in the back row?
Ah, a good question, young Sir! The answer, contrary to the popular belief, is not that they wouldn't know what a PM is. Indeed, the older research suggests such hypothesis, but the more recent experiments have shown that they are capable of using the PM function much like most of the ordinary forum people. Therefore a new theory has been put forward, further strengthening the idea of vain Internet pride, that people suffering from the syndrome also crave for audience. For in their minds they think themselves highly clever and believe that they are proverbially blinding the unwashed masses with their shining wit and cunning one liners. Years of therapy has been proven to heal them from such delusions in some cases, but unfortunately the work has proved fatal for many therapists who have lost their minds due to years of listening to the clumsy and unoriginal one liners of their patients.
Ah, another question?
Yes, many have asked that same, eternal question: is there something to be done? So far the researchers are still arguing this. Some suggest that reasoning with the patients will eventually make them understand the futility of their attempts and the severeness of their condition, but some, more skeptical scientists suggest that these people are beyond help. All, however, agree that engaging in mud slinging contest with a person suffering from the syndrome is futile waste of time and the best course of action is to simply stop replying.
Yes, young lady in there.
Yes, that's right, indeed some have suggested that such course of action makes the patient think he has won the Internet debate, thus reinforcing the condition. However, we will have to consider closely what do we want more: to fight an uphill battle and eventually lose our minds and fill the forum with pages and pages of uselessness, or to carry on with our lives and not to spoil it for everyone else. For it has been also been theorized that a person suffering from the "last word syndrome" is often suffering from the "sniper syndrome" and will, with relentless fervor, look you up in every single thread you ever post after insulting him and try to turn it into another last word competition. Therefore it is widely believed that for your own sanity you should avoid continuing the discourse as soon as you spot the symptoms in the other person.
This concludes our lesson for today.
