The reason schools have policies like this is because parents frequently attempt to have each other removed from call lists, mailing lists or various other rosters when divorced or estranged. School administrators have found themselves in the middle of these type of affairs. Even worse is when the non-custodial parent attempts to dupe the school into releasing the children to him or her. Now the school district finds itself in the middle of a legal proceeding. The same is for trips to or from school. The bus is district property; the driver a district employee. Until you step foot off that bus, the school's regulations apply. And I'm more than willing to wager that the office staff thought that the students were just as rude as you thought they were.
Trust me, the school is equally sick of being thrown into the middle of your personal affairs. A lot of the reason that I got out of K-12 education is because parents and community members have interfered in the educational process so much that the actual teaching is now a miniscule percentage of what you have to deal with on a daily basis.
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