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Old 06-22-12, 08:58 AM   #2
Hottentot
Sea Lord
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: My private socialist utopia of Finland
Posts: 1,918
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Well, I'm El Presidente now, so that's going to change! We are going to claim this island back to the civilization from the Monkey Overlords coconut by coconut! Viva la industrial revolucion!




First things first: these disgraceful cardboard boxes have to go.




That space is much better used by building a pub there instead. I'm sure everyone agrees with me. Well, except maybe the cardboard box people, but who cares?! They won't vote! I know because I'm not allowing elections in the first place!




OK, then the next thing in priority order. The old El Presidente's cigar collection is quickly running out of smokes, so we need to make these natives grow me new ones.




Also sugar. Sugar is good for booze, which this island also has shamefully little.




And finally: I'm sick of all this green stuff! Monkeys and their lackeys live in there! I want them all cut down!




Because I'm genius and these morons are not, I'm personally guiding them in the construction projects. It would be even more efficient if they managed to find their way to the sites to begin with.




Excellent! The farms are finally ready!




And here comes a big fat ship desperate to buy anything left over from my personal use! Hahaa! Money!!




See? This is what I'm all about! My first year in office is over and we have already conquered this much space from the banana munchers! Glorious beginning!




However, the people are not as hard working as I am! They haven't managed to bring me, their illustrious leader, any income at all! Now I need...

Wait? What's that? "Foreign Aid"? Like, these countries are giving me money? Just like that? No catch? Oh well, I say. A sucker is born every minute. Now, if one bottle of beer costs one dollar, that makes it...
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