Welcome to the forums. SH5, like the other SH titles can be as real as you want to make between difficulty settings and mods. Here are just a few of the "must have" mods that I think most people would agree upon.
TDW multiple UI & TDC mod - gives you functioning realistic TDC dials and more options for nav map, scope views, etc. than you can shake a stick at. If I told you everything that was in this mod the post would be 10 pages.
IRAI - Fixes the enemy AI. Escorts now pose a serious threat. Nuf' said.
TDW FX Update mod - adds a lot of good eye candy and other things like parachuting fighter pilots.
Stormy's DBSM sound mod - Fixes sound problems and adds a whole heap of immersive sounds.
These are the basic ones that I think are most important. The first two are arguably a necessity. Have fun.
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