[nikimcbee]

Originally Posted by krashkart

I think it's in the scriptures somewhere... probably in an unofficial rewrite where Moses takes a wrong turn at Cairo and ends up talking to a scraggly little shrub on Ayer's Rock (much to the amusement of some nearby aborigines).

The Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt not grope the wildlife

Ah, I found it. 5th Book of Leviticus chapter 75:

Brother Krashkart, if you could please read.



And thus the Lord saith, Behold this land is given unto the wick of my children for they violateth all manner of beasts including, the wombat, the platapus, the koala, the kangaroo, the wallaby, and the salty. And Moses was confused in the eyes of the Lord and having said, Lord, I ain't writing down all of those animals, for the children of man don't have the atention span to read all of that. Thus the Lord gave unto the people of the land down under a leader. And on this day the Lord created a man and called him Bon. And the people rejoiced proclaiming; "Crickey, we have another reason to drink fosters!" And thus the people follow Bon into the outback for forty years. And on the forty and first year, the deciple of Bon, called Angus the Younger proclaimed yea, let us celebrate this day, and they ate fruitbats, and mangos, and kiwis. And the Lord said unto the people of Bon, don't eat the kiwis as that is cannablism. For this sin, I curse you with a second rate cricket team for forty years.
And lo, the pommies came from ships made of wood and the Barmey Army did scouge the people of Bon in cricket.

Now Bon was angry and laid with a kiwi and begat a son, Reece, and Reece begat Paul the carrier of the big knife, and he begat Steven the crocodile lover, and he begat Men at Work, who begat Olivia the Newton. And everybody wanted to lie with her, which confuseth the whole situation.