[frau kaleun]

Originally Posted by krashkart

After tuning the Dish Network to an obscure deity frequency I begged the question: "Is it cool that frau kaleun will never go comando again on Christmas? Cuz, she like caused a tsunami here on Earth and...". I was muffled immediately. God appeared before me, thumped me on the chest with his wriggly tentacles and shouted, "You ***hole! I'm watching Big Bang Theory and you interrupt me with such nonsense?!? One more peep outta you, mister, and you will never find a decent beer again!". He disappeared with a flash, leaving a pile of cigarette butts all over my floor.

You forgot "First I Must Sprinkle You With Fairy Dust."

10. The Earth quakes and the heavens rattle; the beasts of nature flock together and the nations of men flock apart; volcanoes usher up heat while elsewhere water becomes ice and melts; and then on other days it just rains. 11. Indeed do many things come to pass. - HBT; The Book of Predictions, Chap. 19